I can’t even miss a dose of meds or I get symptomatic. Not a full blown episode. I doubt it would take long for me to get there, thought, but my SZA is considered treatment resistant.
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My biggest problem right now is mixed episodes. I haven’t lost touch with reality, but I’m admittedly scared. I’ve run into some paranoia (I thought I was being poisoned but realized my line of thinking shortly after it started, and learning it wasn’t real helped settle it down) and (this is new) shadow men. The shadow men are getting worse. I asked my doctor what to do earlier today because I had such a bad night; she hasn’t responded yet. For a while, I was doing so well that I just sat in the dark all the time! I know that sounds weird, but I’ve been scared of what’s in the dark my whole life. It was a big change. I’m back to keeping the light on because of the shadow men, but they are usually only really bad if I leave bed. Being alone is my biggest trigger, more even than dark. I also can’t go downstairs by myself. They run around in my peripheral vision. I know they aren’t real, though. But they still scare me.
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I had a friend who is ap free for 7 years now and his voices disappeared after 7 years, he could cope with his symptoms since year 1 without ap so long he doesn’t drink alcohol
However he’s an exception out of thousands of patients. His father is also like that so I suspect it’s really down to genetics
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I will go downhill quick after about 3-4 days without meds. I’m on clozapine which really works well…but sometimes I want to stop it because there are “good” parts of psychosis for me, like hearing the Dalai Lama tell me things. I had 4 voices, now I only have 1 of the mean ones. I also liked how much less I weighed when I would go 2-3 weeks not eating…now I’m a beached whale. I don’t have so much suicidal ideation anymore.
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