Everyone practically by the age of 30 has a little PTSD going on. It’s the norm, at least for our generation. Hence the special snowflake syndrome, a touch of psychosis leads to it IMO. Part of psychosis is a sense of persecution and a lack of personal autonomy and free will.
You gotta understand the real persecution is that evil voice/entity inside your head. Without it, you could deal with the real world much easier and it wouldn’t seem like such an evil place.
Evil voice/entity in your head, you mean consciousness and self conscience?
The only entity in my head is me, and I’m not evil. A bit eccentric, sure. I have an illness, it’s treatable, there’s no mystery here.
The evil “imaginary” entity inside my head impersonates the voices of the people around me, including family when I am in their vacinity, and says very evil things in their voices, making people seem bigger, badder, and more powerful than they actually are. Then it gimps me.
I’m pretty eccentric too. My username on Camfrog used to be eccenteric. Get it because my names Eric woot woot.
You know who probably had a really evil voice inside their head? Hitler -.-
Sometimes it feels like I am in a concentration camp surrounded by a bunch of lunatic telepaths.
Lunatic telepaths… gotta be better than lunatic psychopaths right?
I’ve felt like living here on earth is living in hell… I thought I was in hell… I thought because I didn’t get to ascend to the stars and fly up to the cosmos I was stuck in hell… it was a pretty scary delusion
It doesn’t go away. The point is you become desensitized to it to where it doesn’t cause you huge anxiety and pain anymore and you can look back on it like any other memory.
I don’t want to get rid of my anger and hatred.
The main focus is making it so the bad memories no longer give you large amounts of anxiety or cause dissociation or flashbacks, or in our case trigger psychosis, no extreme responses. If you want to still be angry and hateful go ahead, though in my opinion that’s not very beneficial to anyone.
(Though me saying that is a bit hypocritical as I have bad anger issues myself 
But I have been trying to overcome them for some time now)
@anna you mean I’m still in hell o.O
I’m kidding , I know I’m not, it’s not even real it’s just a belief I was programmed to believe in as a child so I wouldn’t do bad things or I’d be punished by the almighty invisible person… heh.
But I guess your right the feeling of it being like hell is still there…
I guess with time you do become desensitized to your own abnormal thinking and either accept it or fight till you implant healthy beliefs that can overcome the harmful ones o.o
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When you’re psychotic normal people seem like psychopaths. Being normal is being a psycho of sorts and that’s the truth. But you can’t let that ■■■■ psyche you out. Truth is we’re psychos ourselves and that might be part of why this is happening to us, behavior modification.
That’s true…when I’m psychotic everyone seems terrifying, like a potential threat…that’s why I practically laugh when doctors ask me if I’m ever a threat to others as it’s completely the opposite way around when I’m ill!
Yes when you are weak the devil comes out to play.
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Don’t expect much in the way of meaningful recovery then. Or meaningful relationships. That’s kind of a turn off to those who could help and comfort you. 
I’ve never seen a person play with their voices and get better. Not once, ever, in a quarter century of knowing other SZs. Learn to recognize the symptom and then minimize it is the most successful approach. Meds, therapy, and CBT, man.
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