My earliest memories are of me contemplating god even though I grew up in a totally secular family. The first time I remember hearing voices are at age seven. I had a very distinct hallucination at about age eight or nine. One could take all this as early signs of schizophrenia. I did not live in the real world because my family fought too much for me to deal with it. I made friends easily and was extraordinarily happy until my fifteenth year and then I turned to drug addiction to self medicate. I dwelt on mental illness for awhile indulging in self pity. Jump ahead to almost age seventeen I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia (later to be changed to sza)after a disturbing anxiety hit me. I know I was fated for this illness now, I recently realized, even if I’d never used bad drugs. I can forgive people I blamed now, namely my mother. I have to forgive myself for big mistakes though they were caused by the illness. My life turned out badly, I was very gifted. Now at 52 I’m realizing that turning your potential into reality is much much harder than I thought and don’t know what exactly my potential is just that I’ve got a good memory and Imagination.
I got my first psychosis age 24. No signs of psychosis before that.
I don’t wanna believe it,
but my mom said early on in my diagnosis, You’ve always been weird.
I was so pissed!
Looking back, I always had it. I always felt like some kind of imposter. Since I was a child.
I got diagnosed with chronic paranoid schizophrenia and psychosis in September 2015 when I was 25 but I had symptoms since 2013 shortly after I turned 23 in April that year. That August it got worse after I moved to a new city and developed negative symptoms. I said and did some bad and wrong things when I was a kid and teen. But I think I was mostly normal until I turned 23.
I was diagnosed at age 27.
My first psychosis was when I was 17
In retrospect I probably developed my first delusion at 13. I thought the devil was trying to steal my soul and that if I even had a thought about giving it to him I’d go to hell. Drove myself crazy.
That’s so unreasonable!
The devil is an unreasonable guy lol. Delusions don’t have to make sense. I’m just trying to wrap my head around why we believe them.
Full blown sz from 21 and got back on horse 
at 24 till 29 and now struggling to get back up.
I got lost in the imagination at an early age. How can I be true to myself?
No but way before my sz diagnosis, I got a short glimpse of psychosis. In 2004, I smoked a cannabis blunt and experienced intense but temporary paranoia – lasting less than 3 hours. That was my first “preview” into psychosis.
I was diagnosed at age 24 in late 2013.
I know its hard, we are all here now.
there were signs my whole life growing up that I was destined for sz. prodromal stuff…
The first hallucination i can remember is seeing a skeleton at night in the corner of my room. I couldnt go to the bathroom i was too scared.
I was like 7 or 8, but id see it on more than one ocassion.
But kids have wild imaginations.
And i heard a voice telling me to jump off of a ferry when i was 14
No I wasn’t until age 27-28 when I was prodromal.
But I have always thought that I’ve been watched. I checked behind mirrors for cameras. Looked into vents to see if there’s any cameras there. Looked out the windows to see if somebody is watching me.
I had my first positive symptoms at age 15 but I have been having negatives since I was 8 years old.
I guess so that would explain some things
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