I just found out that an old boyfriend committed suicide violently last week. It kind of breaks my heart… he had such spirit. The worst part is that I got all the details of the events from one of my nursing instructors in post-conference and I just knew it was him from what she described. Then later I found out it was him for sure.
Having a hard time with this news. Added to my depression lately = ticking time bomb. I keep asking myself “if he could do it, why can’t/couldn’t I?” Plus unresolved issues from my past attempts are coming up… Life sucks.
I made a sincere suicide attempt when I was 16. I ended up in the hospital hooked up to a ventilator for 2 days before being able to breathe on my own. So yeah, I’ve been down that road. 5 years later, my father violently committed suicide, and it left a mark on me. Honestly, it made me do a double-take. I reexamined how precious life is, and resolved to never commit suicide. Suicide is a horrible thing.
Learn from the ripples in the sea your ex-boyfriend’s suicide has left on people. Imagine how his family, friends, and other close ones reacted. Would you really want to inflict that on others? Probably not. Life sucks, but it sucks more when you’re dead and your family is left in disaster.
I’m sorry this happened, for him, his family and like you… those who had a connection to him.
Take care of yourself, and don’t isolate.
I tried to seriously leave this life, and woke up in hospital to a deeply traumatized family. I was so confused when I woke up. It made me see that suicide/ even the attempt, only hurt the family more. It wouldn’t have made them better off… it just added to the pain.
A few years ago, I also got word that an ex-girlfriend left this life… it didn’t help ease her family, it only made them beat themselves up more for not trying harder. It stung when I got the news… it’s a hard thing to come to terms with.
Keep your loved ones close and I wishing the best for you.
I’m so sorry … There was a guy here that I knew from clubs but we were not close…yet when he did that I felt really bad and empty.
I believe that none suicide is committed in rational state of mind…it is a moment of slipping from reality…If you are patient enough and wait the pressure will pass. @sohare1981 had some good way to deal with suicidal thoughts I think.
I’m so sorry for your friend. Please don’t take that as an invititation to do the same. The pain you inflict is greater than the one that you’re dealing with for sure.
I’m sorry for your loss. I can’t say I know what it’s like to loose someone from suicide but I have lost a few people close to me due to health/age issues.
The only thing I can recommend is not to act on any passing thought as they come into your head. Stop. Really think about what your considering. Wait at least 24/48 hours before following through anything, for me the mood always passes within that time period.
Also try asking yourself do you really want to die for all time, or just for this moment in time? I remember reading that somewhere.
Another thing I use when I get super depressed and the thought of suicide creeps up on me, make plans for tomorrow (even if it’s something incredibly simple), for the next day, for the next week, month…and so on. It will take your mind off of any unwanted thoughts.
I`m so sorry for the loss!
If you ever have this thought-call someone right away.
Sometimes talking helps the moment pass-and it will pass! If life seems hard, remember that nothing stays the same-the opposite is also true–something good is after that bad moment! OO
Thanks everyone for your words, your right those feelings passed. I feel a little better today. I feel like I should pat myself on the back for getting through that SI. But that seems stupid.
They finally put a obituary in the paper and they are having calling hours at a nearby funeral home. I’m not sure whether to go or not. I’m thinking I may not because there is someone I don’t want to run into who was his best friend. That might send me back into that hole again if I see him cause he’s such a jerk.
I was able to get into see the social worker on such short notice. I guess it was good to have someone to talk to but I still don’t like her. Then yesterday i saw the pdoc. We upped my meds to more therapeutic doses. She said if I don’t see some improvement in a month then we’ll try another combo of drugs. She suggested Cymbalta.
I’m glad you’re feeling better, I knew if you just held out the mood would pass. It doesn’t change what happened, you may relapse into another depression. It’s good to continue seeking out help, the road isn’t over yet, please don’t loose hope.
