When I used to feel bad, I used to eat until I was sick of too much food instead of all the problems. It had a numbing effect but led to all the problems of obesity. Now, I just get headaches. I’m not sure which is the worse coping mechanism but nobody nags me about my weight anymore. It’s “normal”.
You just saw the pdoc and he adjusted your meds, right? How much time are you gonna give the new meds to work? Things still seem to be going badly for you. You have to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, even if that means going to crisis.