Today will be tidying my room. I should really post a photo of its condition
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I feel so tired iāll probably end up in bed all day.
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I have been on the phone to the benefits people much of the morning.
So frustrating.
They said the decision maker on my Universal Credit Incapacity to work is 6 days overdue making a decision
I am not required to see them F2F for an assessment, which I hope is good news
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I have read a few things. Watched a couple of things. Not much really.
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Iām leaving for a trip! Iāve been packing all morning and soon itās about time to leave. Iām going to Helsinki for a gig and tomorrow Stockholm for another gig! Iām so excited and happy. I have missed this so much.
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waiting for a pickup order from instacart and later have to bring my friend home after his hernia surgery. might do some laundry later when I get home.
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I just woke up and will be leaving the house to attend group soon. Last week I was allowed to go on Friday after taking a COVID home test kit. I think it helps, it felt good to be back.
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My manager texted me and asked me if I could come into work. So Iām heading out to work in a few minutes.
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Well, yesterday I had three naps and today I had two. I dont know what itās all about, but might be because Iāve been getting out more and practicing more yoga.
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I showered and shampooed. Itās waking me up but I still feel unmotivated.
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i read the news and drank coffee. then i went to my clubhouse but i was panicking sitting there. should have just gone for lunch. read a while sotting on the deck then i put two bags of soil in the new planter. now i made another pot of coffee and im going to read my book. oh i ordered 3 more boxes of cigars. ecuadorean tobacco very mild.
thats it fir the day.
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Walked a few blocks to store
Downloading game update, play after
Considering lunch
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Tidyed my bedroom. Feels great.
Washed my hair. Feels good.
Not much else.
So far
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been shop for food
felt like hubby was driving 100 mph but he insists he was only doing 20
i hate cars really hate them
i donāt like them
canāt go very far anxiety is thru the roof just going ten mins away
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Itās almost 11:30am. Iāve only eaten breakfast, earlier, and took a shower. I washed my hair.
I need to go to Costco for some things. 
Dunno if I can work up the energy to go.
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I should be calling local IOPs, and therapists bc my situation depends on it but I feel paralyzed. I really donāt think this is being caused by my own head, but my head is being affected. Getting psychiatric help would be like admitting my own brain is doing this and I know itās not. It canāt be. Iām stuck.
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Sorry for the belated wishes, but Happy Birthday!! Iām glad you had a wonderful day!!
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Today I havenāt accomplished much.
Called the ECT suite and changed my appointment from today to Friday.
I posted here, to catch up a little.
Despite my ābetterā mood, my motivation seems to be soooooo low. I just donāt want to do anything. Including taking a shower and working out, which were the original plans for the day. Ugh. Itās so embarrassing that showering is so hard for me. Maybe Iāll take a bath instead. My tub is so big, though, it takes forever to fill up.
Anyway.
Iām going to DisneyWorld with my sister next week (weāre season pass holders), and Iāve gained a bunch of weight (also embarrassing), so I need some more clothes because I donāt have enough to get me through the trip. So I ordered some online. Hopefully, I will like them.
Thatās all so far.
Basically, not much.
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Woke up @6, made coffee, journaled, dropped kid to school, updated prescriptions, put air in tires, ate will soon get kid from school.
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I did some grocery shopping and went to the bakery for some treats.
Besides that I was on the phone most of the day calling family.
Tranquil days.
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