if you could marry anyone on the forum, who would you marry?
I would marry @sirBoring , or myself, of course. 
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âyou will marry the first person who says
your eyes are like scrambled eggs.â
I think that was Frank OâHara.
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@Daze, youâre next in line; if @sirBoring refuses to wed me. 
unless youâre already taken. 
in that case, can I be your friend forever? 
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awww,
too kind.
If I get married I lose ssdi.
But itâd be worth it.
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if we got married, I would like get a job and like be a better man!!! 
i would even consider like joining the army, to like support us!!! 
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Guys, I may or may not be from the future! I have a very important message.
In the future, air will not be free!
you will have to pay for oxygen!
HOARD AS MUCH OXYGEN AS YOU CAN NOW! ITS PRICE IS GOING TO SKYROCKET!
If youâre in the oxygen business, nowâs your time to shine! I just gave you inside information, or insider information. I donât know the phrase because I wasnât good at Economics. 
something Iâve seen had air in a bottle
you could open
and take you to a certain memory
was that Harry Potter?
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I think so. I think so.
no hairy potters were harmed in the development of this photo album (at least not physically⊠the photos might have shamed them, even though we constantly told them that âhair is the new rave.â)
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this is my Mad Scientist TheoryâŠ
if youâve been through high school. then props!
if youâve graduated college. youâre epic! 
if youâve succeeded in graduate school. wow! 
but be wary of super super graduate school⊠
because then they know youâre getting too smartâŠ
thereâs a time when you get so smart that you take over the classroom. you literally walk up to the professor, take his lesson book, and start teaching the class.
âStudent A is getting too smartâŠâ
âreally?â
âyes, he took over the classroom⊠this is getting⊠problematicâŠâ
âwell what do you want me, the principal, to do about it?â
âyou know⊠do âthat thing.ââ
âoh⊠âthat thing.ââ
âyes⊠âthat thingââŠâ
âuhhh⊠what is âthat thingâ again?â
âyou dumbhead!â
they force you to enroll in a âspecial super super honorsâ class.
then they give you a classroom partner who is going to be so attractive, that youâll start spending all your time with romantic stuff. 
thatâs why 80% of super super graduate students become married! 
but what happens to the other 20%? 
well, they shrug off their partner and the partner tells the community about it.
and then everyone in the community says youâre weird.
and you get mad. so steaming mad.
you become a mad scientistâŠ
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I got a letter from social security. my mom yelled at me to open it.
anyhow, they sent a mail telling me that, starting next year, they are going to give me 2 MORE DOLLARS!
itâs a miracle!
my mom wasnât that happy though. she still scolded meâŠ
when my brother came from his work I told him. he said âhow much money did the government spend, sending that mail to you?â then he slapped his head and said, âoh yeah, they probably assume you donât have internet for an email address.â
BUT WOW! 2 DOLLARS!
I can finally buy a wedding ring, and propose to my imaginary wife. 
or I can go on vacation to London or Peru. 
or hire a maid⊠to help my imaginary wife and children.
or I can invest in the stock market and turn this surplus money into MORE MONEY! 
Iâm so excited, right now!
new new year resolutions!
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Tell them getting in online you have to give up your first born child.
I donât have a first born child⊠
but maybe we can change thatâŠ
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Thou will bathe and shave every day
Or
No sex
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shaving everyday, eh?
I donât think a manâs hair even grows that quickly.
how about shaving every week�
Was told on OK cupid
When no man
English enlightened
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I like English people too. just have to change the location settings on OKcupid and boom!
but those people might not respond because they live too far away.
They shave once a week or more
Their men are hardcore