I’m very upset that I can’t meditate because it gave me a purpose in life. My girlfriend left me six months ago, there were a few friends left, I was banned at the local (Russian) forum on schizophrenia for the topic of medicines. I want to end my life because of anxiety and inability to learn, to work. I’ve already tried a lot of medication, but the chemical imbalance in my head because of drugs is too serious
If you are feeling suicidal or having a mental health crisis, please tell someone — a friend or family member, a teacher, a doctor or therapist or call 911 (if you’re in the U.S.) or the Emergency Medical Services phone number in your country.
You can also call a crisis intervention hotline—these are available in the U.S. and in many other countries. You do not need to be actively suicidal to benefit from a crisis hotline.
International crisis hotlines:
Crisis hotlines in the U.S.:
https://www.thetrevorproject.org
More resources:
Welcome to this forum …
sorry to hear that you are doing so unwell,
try not to give up, things might change,…
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Welcome to the forum. I hope you find something that helps you in this time of need. There are a ton of great people on this forum and we have your back. 
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welcome to the forum!
i am also sorry to hear you are having a hard time.
are you still using drugs?
Nope. Still sober for 2 years
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ah that’s good! congratulations!
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Welcome to the forum.
When I get suicidal, it’s always on my mind that I’ve been here before, and it passes, but only if you allow yourself the time.
I hope you see things differently soon.
Welcome to the forum, Karma.
Welcome to the forum! I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. This is a supportive community so you’ve found a good place to be.
Welcome to the forum. I know how hard it is to cope with thoughts about suicide. Suicide is permanent, the way you are feeling now is temporary. You will feel better again in time.
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Battle is not between people instead with the devil. He give you this kind of thoughts. So not get deceived. Be brave and keep fighting till your last breath.
@Leaf is right. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Talk to your doctor about a medication change. I’ve tried meds that didn’t work, had bad side effects, stopped working, but I have now found one that works perfectly with no side effects. Just don’t give up.
Welcome to the forums!
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