TLDR; I am fully recovered- should I just let the past be behind me? Should I ever tell anyone about it? I once told myself that if I ever recovered, I would never tell anyone I met.
So I have started dating a guy. He lives three hours away and just left. We had sex three times this weekend and it was his first time, and I really like him, I feel for him, and he said he really likes me. I told him I have an anxiety disorder, which I do, but I didnt tell him that I have schizophrenia and have been in remission and stable for over a year now.
But I wonder if I even should.
As long as I take my medication, I am fine. I really am recovered, a fraction of people diagnosed fully recover with medication, and I am in that fraction of people, and I know I am lucky to have survived schizophrenia. I know how much it sucks and how it ruins lives and is a waking nightmare. I was psychotic for nearly two years. I was functionally recovered a year ago but still psychotic to a lesser degree, by winter break last year I was not psychotic at all. In the fall of 2013 I got on my current meds and have been 90-99% symptom free, nerves and stress make my symptoms fluctuate.
I am very muscular. I do not look mentally ill at all. I know my ■■■■ about weightlifting and nutrition. I do very well in school, I am on a full scholarship and in my junior year studying psychology.
I apparently do not appear mentally ill at all because I just spent friday afternoon to just an hour ago with this guy and he had no clue I was schizophrenic.
I have made the mistake of telling people I date too soon about it. It scares them away. I dont want to scare this guy away. I really have feelings for him.
I just don’t know what to do. The other people I have been intimate with put me in the friends with benefits zone, mostly likely because they knew about it.
TLDR; I am fully recovered- should I just let the past be behind me? Should I ever tell anyone about it? I once told myself that if I ever recovered, I would never tell anyone I met.