As I talk to you guys I feel like everything I write here is reviewed by people. As I’m at the gym, they’re watching me on cameras. As I talk on the phone, they’re listening in. As I clean both my home and my body in the shower they watch me and judge me on how well or not we’ll I do it. Every moment I’m monitored. Every moment I’m judged. Animals read my mind and respond accordingly. I take my meds religiously. Now I’m on the 100mg Haldol shot every month. Im exhausted by all this
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You appear very well grounded here for the level of your delusions that you have.
I’m obviously not your pdoc, but if I were in your shoes, I would be asking for a change in meds. If it were me, I would want to mix things up and see if I can’t get some improvement.
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I’m sorry that can’t be easy and an invasion of privacy 
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Which was your best med for positive symptoms?
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Invega. But I can’t afford it anymore
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Thanks @Bowens. I feel like I’m grounded because it’s all real and I’m not crazy. Does that make sense?
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Sort of. These are delusions though. I had delusions about people being able to see through animals eyes. I think I mentioned before that I remember chasing a few rabbits off because of this. I used to think that certain people could “interupt” certain humans and see through them and control them as well. I also thought that they could see through my eyes and read my thoughts. I thought trains and police vehicles were responding to my thoughts by their whistles and sirens because the people in them could be controlled as well. So I thought I was constantly monitored as well. So I have some idea of what you are going through. It is not a pleasant feeling.
If you can’t switch back to Invega because of the cost, maybe you can talk to your doctor about trying something less expensive? Just a suggestion. If I were in your shoes, where I have some idea that my thoughts are not quite right, I would definitely be trying to shake things up for relief.
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I’m sorry that you are going through this @LilyoftheValley
Maybe it’s time for a med adjustment/change
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Are there generic versions of Invega? Are they any good?
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Yeah. I’ll talk to my dr on Friday
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Yes. The generic is $600 per month. I don’t qualify for coupons because I have Medicare. But I don’t qualify for Medicaid so I have to pay a lot out of pocket that I can’t afford
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