Well, its a pity I spent 20 years with no life… Ok, today I felt some good for brief, but I have few time left… I should hurry up with my recovery wow 
. Its really hard to know, that you were such a prisoner by the illness… Really, its too much lost time… I have to forget my ex too, he never loved me. But maybe I am not alone. I guess this forum is full of people, who lost almost everything on their way… I just hope I wont get suicidal again. The thought of it is still sometimes here. But whatever. I just found this song, check it, its very touching 
Dedicated to all you girls here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Fv19KVVya8
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Uh ohhh. Slav ladies in that video. That means “lave ladies.” 
KAZKA Lyrics
Play “Cry”
on Amazon Music
"Cry"
(ПЛАКАЛА English Version)
What do you see? If I escape will I be saved?
Can’t estimate when you’ll fade, tell me I can’t wait
I’m learning fast, I can’t turn back
I died a million times when you left, when you said goodbye
What do you see, can you speak will I be saved?
My hearts on ice, can’t think twice, tell me why oh why
I’m falling fast, stuck in the past
I try and understand, it hurts so bad, how long will it last?
I’m flying through the storms
The answer is in the sky
That everything I am is because of you
But I know I won’t die
I’ll live without your love
I’ll take back every word, every woman’s tears
What do you feel? Say it loud, speak into my soul
A winters day never fades, that’s what I was told
I lost myself without your help
I fell straight back to hell or is it heaven? Maybe, I don’t know
I’m flying through the storms
The answer is in the sky
That everything I am is because of you
But I know I won’t die
I’ll live without your love
I’ll take back every word, every woman’s tears
I’m flying through the storms
The answer is in the sky
That everything I am is because of you
But I know I won’t die
I’ll live without your love
I’ll take back every word, every woman’s tears
I’m flying through the storms
The answer is in the sky
That everything I am is because of you
But I know I won’t die
I’ll live without your love
I’ll take back every word, every woman’s tears
I’m flying through the storms
The answer is in the sky
That everything I am is because of you
But I know I won’t die
I’ll live without your love
I’ll take back every word, every woman’s tears
Is that script Russian? I’m a little familiar with it but have lost so much knowledge.
I think its Ukrainian.
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