I'm Crying, pt. 2

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I’m trying to make sense of sadness that I’ve been feeling. I’ve been trying to make sense of why I’m crying.

First of all, I’m imagining myself all alone with no one to be with. It’s not my mom- it’s about loneliness. I’ve been feeling so bad because I felt lonely. Also, I’m crying about missing my mom when my mom is across the room, sleeping right there.

Second of all, I have to move out of my original family as an adult sometime. It’s a passage of life and I’m sure my mom and I will meet every year or so, or even talk on Skype every week or even every day.

Anyway, after I cried yesterday, I started to have a fever that left me ill. After I got off Discord after a talk with some of the friends on this site, my mom came to see how I was doing. She put her hand on me and realized I was having a fever. I slept and woke up to my dog licking my entire face.

So I’m thinking that my sadness is rather not based on anything that is happening in real life. It’s just my depression, I think.

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I’ve been lonely too because of the voices and the medications. Just know you are loved!

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The meme thread helps me when I’m feeling depressed!

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Sometimes the sadness happens for no real reason. It just hits us randomly. And then we try to attribute reasons for feeling that way, and look for reasons to be sad. But honestly, sometimes there’s really no reason other than your brain didn’t produce enough serotonin that day.

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