I’d probably be homeless or dead. I cannot function right now.
If I was on the streets, I’d probably quit the meds and try to get a job. I have zero motivation on meds. Even with a minimum wage job, I couldn’t afford rent around here. It’s a never ending cycle.
I’m stuck in the poverty trap.
Luckily, I have a place to live right now, I have benefits, and a possible future.
In the winter I sleep pretty much nonstop.
I am coming out of that cycle.
I went from the bed to the couch.
Now I pretty much sit on the chair so I’m not laying down all the time.
I stand. It’s hard on the sheets.
I sit in my recliner all day and night whenever I’m awake.
And being 16 years old, lol. When I was 16, I could go to school, come home and fix a snack and then head out to run around and play football for two hours with my friends. It barely made me tired.
Today at age 58 it takes 99% of my energy to push the buttons on this keyboard, lol.
I sleep up until 2pm on somedays. It took a while for me to break that habit but I fall back into it often. I feel like sometimes I sleep my life away but hey I figure there’s nothing else to do so why not. No one to talk to, not enough people to talk to, not enough to talk about, not enough money to do anything, and nothing to do worth paying for at the time needed, so really sleeping is it.
Winter is the worst
I also have no choice but to work. I agree that letting the disorder get the better of you isn’t the greatest strategy, but we’re all at different stages of the illness. For some it’s an escape.
Not for me though. I have to keep myself busy and that helps me cope as having other things to think about is a good distraction.
Lately that’s all I seem to do… Just lay in bed. I’m probably spending 14 to 20 hours in bed a day. I have a certain problem going on in my life that I can’t talk about here and I think I’m getting pretty depressed about it cuz this is not like me but the truth is I’m in bed all day. Yes I’m on Wellbutrin whippy ding it’s not working. F_ck.
If im dead bored i will take my night meds at about 4pm and bugger off to bed - i need at least 12 hours sleep anyway - any less and im cranky.
I force myself to do things, but in bad times i prefer sleeping so i dont need to feel and think. I spend too much time in bed.
lately I’ve been in bed most days. I can’t seem to get motivated to do anything else, I’m too depressed.
I spend most of the day working at my desk
Last year I could do all the things you said without any energy boosters, but now with medication, I can’t. Like once I did two football practices a day just fine.
Yeah. I’m going to have to get an antidepressant too now that my meds have evened out and proven I’m still depressed too. Hang in there. Maybe ask to try something better than wellbutrin.
I lay in bed as late as 12 most days. It is not good that I do it.
Sometimes I struggle to leave bed because it feels safe. I sit up, but I am still in bed. It is scary out there, especially lately. I know I’m heading downhill, and I really need to see my pdoc.
I jump out of bed at 6 am.
Do my exercise routine
Have breakfast and shower
Do some reading
Visit some friends
Have a really nice day
Just kidding. Spend most of the day in bed
I lie on the couch all day on my phone on this site or on Duolingo. German and Korean. Have no idea why I picked those languages.
Yesterday I read about the war in Syria a little. My pdoc is Syrian so to relate to him I want to understand it.
Defragmenting -