Ive been there. Or sleep all day and night. Eventually i made a decision that I would stop wasting all my time doing that and slowly started doing more stuff.
i feel sometimes like destroyed and i am someone else now. i want my old self back but cannot.
judy
I feel alive. I feel even better when I quitted ablify (month without ablify)
I feel energetic and well, and it’s very connected to sleep. When I have a good rest - I feel very good all day.
I noticed one strange phenomena - I experience hallucinations in a state while falling asleep. Most of the time before sleep I start thinking it’s Sz, until I realise it’s sleep hallucinations.
Overall, about feeling alive… I noticed that having a work changed my life a lot. I feel very good when I can communicate. Communicating with tons of people (it’s my job nature) makes me feel very good and fulfilled. ((Atleast when clients or colleagues are not getting on my nerves))
Try a cold shower in the morning and workout. Also go outside get coffee engage in what you like
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I feel like im just existing, I just sit in this chair all day long, every day. The negative symptoms are really hard to deal with.
I feel alive sometimes.
I like those fleeting moments!
I don’t feel alive at all. I just lie on the couch all day long. It’s been like this for years.
I’m so appallingly tortured unceasingly and was so suicidal
But when I socialize, I totally forget I have sz!
so in twain
I feel alive when I’m working on stuff or just having a good day. I haven’t done much with my life but I think you have to choose to engage life… whatever that means for you. Don’t let the illness be the definition thing in your life!!!
I feel alive when I eat with control.
Because I’m excited to do self discovery instead of comparison.
No one will ever be me, so I should be proud to be me too, as the only one of my kind.
I’ve had the thought that maybe I died, but it’s just an idea and isn’t a strong delusion. I feel alive. I just deal with meds and schizophrenia. My negatives aren’t too bad. I’m always up to something. I have times where I’m less motivated for sure, but I eventually do something. everyone experiences this stuff differently though.
I feel alive because I trained feeling alive for years and to this day I still do it every single day for hours but I ain’t living and for all the aspects I trained there’s plenty that got lost without me even noticing.
Sometimes I’ll experience some aspects of feeling alive that I don’t know how to train towards and maybe long since forgot about and my mind goes “that used to be everyday and I didn’t even notice it’s been gone for a long long time”. I can feel alive all I want, it’s not the same as actually living.
When I see something beautiful it doesn’t trigger wonderment, I have to go in add the wonderment and tie it into my realization to make the end result indistinguishable, the only thing standing between me and no longer feeling alive is literally me remembering what feeling alive feels like in certain situations and maintaining it for those. All while making sure no funny business happens at the psychological level since for all intents and purposes I am messing with my realization and while it’s helped me so far I know damn well that I am engaging in a calculated risk. It’s not the same.
It’s like having great genetics, eating what you want, living life and having a great body versus making your whole life about fitness, getting periodically injured, tracking what you eat and eating only that which fits the plan, spending hours and hours training and doing cardio for a somewhat similar yet visibly subpar body.
Do I feel alive? Yes, but I ain’t living and this ain’t life. I just remember what feeling alive feels like and I’m a great method actor of sorts, re-enacting how living used to feel like. Sort of like a man who perhaps lost his sight but had a very uncanny imagination and kept up with it, perhaps even made it better in some aspects, but over time without having any new reference it starts to decay in all the aspects that he doesn’t actively maintain, certain colors perhaps grow harder to recall and certain shades are long since forgotten as though they never existed, somewhere present in memory but never in the mind’s eye of the person.
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