Becoming what i detest most

because of mine and the kids abuse, i am becoming the things that i most hated about the abusers. i wish them all manner of ills, from long protracted deaths to eternal damnation in hell, if it exists. i don’t know if ghosts exist but if they do and i die first i’m going to haunt them to their wits ends and drive them insane for what they’ve done to my kids. i used to consider myself a nice person but now i’m not so sure for the things i wish upon them. i have these glorious fantasies of what i’d do to them given half the chance. i make myself sick because i am becoming evil :-(.

your not evil jaynebeal, these guys deserve everything they are going to get, they are going to burn in all eternity so dont worry they will get what they deserve.

thanx dreamer…i hope so xxx

No you are not evil. I do think that you should try to stop thinking about it so much though. Things will turn out how they are going to and you putting yourself through all this probably won’t affect the outcome. I think you are the one getting the most hurt by this thinking. Center on your kids and family. They are your legacy and worth the energy.

from experience it is not worth having these thoughts, as hard as it is it is best to train yourself to fill your heart with forgiveness and love and kindness.
all the hate that you feel ,only makes you sick, not them.
karma exists and never misses , and hell is an unpleasant place to put it midly, they will get what is coming to them.
take care