Today I went for my first appointment with my OB. I found out I’m about 9 weeks pregnant and that so far everything looks good. I discussed my fears with my doctor about having a child with SZ and she told me it’s not a guarantee that I’ll pass on the disorder and we’all deal with everything one step at a time. Overall my fiancé and I left feeling really happy and confident and ready to just enjoy this experience. I had lunch with my friend later and of course she asked me how everything went. I told her everything and she kept asking me more about SZ being hereditary and if I was concerned. It started to kinda get to me and I told her that I was admittedly concerned. She jumped on that opportunity to tell me how I shouldn’t have a kid if I’m “not ready” and it’s not fair to have a kid that has a higher risk of mental illness. She actually said to me “there’s no shame in backing out. Lots of mentally ill women get abortions. I wouldn’t judge you.” It pissed me off so much. She’s extremely liberal and all of her Facebook posts are pro abortion, pro women’s reproductive rights, and very opinionated. Like I get it, you get off on killing unborn babies. Whatever. But it really hurt my feelings that someone I consider a GOOD FRIEND would actually take what’s supposed to be a happy time in my life and try to push her pro abortion agenda on me just because of my mental illness. We ended up getting in a big argument about mental illness and now I don’t know if I wanna be friends with her anymore. Why does everyone treat us like freaks or like we don’t deserve life just because of our conditions? I don’t experience a lot of prejudice for my illness but this is by far the worst experience I’ve ever had. She literally insinuated that my kid doesn’t deserve to be born because there’s a chance of it having SZ. Does that mean MY life is worthless because I have SZ?! I’m horrified at the stigma that is placed on people like us. We have value! We are just as much human as any normie. I’m really upset about this 
your friend sounds bad. I would dump her. You don’t deserve that. I have friends that are extreme left too because I’m a democrat. I feel for you.
Yeah she literally makes multiple Facebook posts a day about how all women should be able to get abortions just because they feel like it and that a woman shouldn’t need evidence to convict a man of rape. She’s the most toxic feminist I’ve ever met. But she’s kept it away from me so I’ve let it go. But now that she’s had the audacity to suggest I get an abortion to avoid having a mentally ill child I don’t think I can be friends with her anymore. I’m conservative so I enjoy have liberal friends to get a different perspective on everything, but she’s just insane. I don’t need this stress from her right now
I have 2 kids all before I was dxd…they haven’t shown any signs of sz…i just try to keep them happy and healthy…maybe having a good dad who doesn’t beat the ■■■■ out of them and tell them they were unwanted accidents will improve their chances for normalcy…just do right by them and congrats…
I’m sorry. That’s a terrible thing to say to a new mom. When people try telling me I shouldn’t have kids because of the risk, I tell them that my life may be hard, but it’s not so hard I wish I had never even been born. My future child deserves the same chance I got.
Hopefully, she will realize that what she said was way out of line. Unfortunately though, major life changes like having a kid can change who your friends are. Some friendships are not adaptable enough to survive huge adjustments, and some are. I hope your friend can adapt for you.
Thanks, my fiancé and I are gonna try to do a good job. I’m glad your kids are healthy 
Besides, according to @mortimermouse, the chance of passing it on is only 13%.
Thanks I hope she apologizes too. I really like her for the most part. That was just so upsetting to hear. I went home and cried about it and my fiancé was really angry that she said that and stressed me out as bad as she did. He got me some Chinese takeout and we watched a movie together so I feel better now. I just needed to share my experience with others who have also been stigmatized for having a mental illness
Youl do fine you seem like a good person…it is life changing it will test your patience but its all worth it…take those prenatal vitamins…and check if your meds should be taken by pregos…you may have to change some of them up or stop some of them all together…
Luckily I’m not on any meds so that’s good. My doctor gave me a list of foods and vitamins I should take. She also told me no more tuna because there’s mercury in it which makes me sad because I love tuna. And she told me that because I’ve had a miscarriage in the past it’s super important I keep my stress level as low as possible. So I won’t be calling my friend up any time soon
You’re so responsible and proactive. You’re going to be a fantastic mom.
Yea that’s a good idea…keep it happy just let the negative forces in your life fade to black…its hard enough to go through pregnancy you don’t need any haters adding to your stress…
Haters gonna hate I guess…
I have Sz and my wife has night sleep terrors. My twins are healthy, happy 12 year old girls at the top of their class in most every category.
Chances are slim you’ll pass on the Sz gene. Just relax and enjoy one of life’s greatest adventures…becoming a Mom! 
Thank you! That makes me feel so good to hear that
Your girls are so pretty! That picture you posted of them was nice I’m glad they’re both healthy and doing well. It makes me feel better about raising my own kids
19% of people in the US have some sort of disability, ergo whenever any couple has kids they take a big risk, but that doesn’t stop them. I have watched a lot of online videos about people with disabilities and it never really stops them from having kids. U r not alone. Best wishes
Thanks hopefully my kid got the good genes 
TYpical female dogs barking at you…don’t worry about it.
Wow. My heart goes out to you! 
️ Congratulations on 9 weeks and everything looking good! 
That “friend” is not a friend to you! I hope/pray that you’ll have a beautiful pregnancy and a healthy/happy baby.
My son is my greatest joy. He has sz. Do I wish on everything that he didn’t have sz?Sure, but he’s an extraordinary individual that I am grateful to have as my son.
I was stupid in that I didn’t even consider that he would inherit my MI, but in a sense it was good because I raised him without that in my mind. You can’t control that, so just enjoy! 
The majority of the odds is that you will be alright.
Don’t let other people take your pen and write your story. The stigma is in large due to them being afraid that perhaps they themselves are prone to illness, which they are, if they are human. Their kid might be a cold-blooded killer who serves in the military, a sadistic professor, a Nobel laureate, or a hot-blooded reptile for all they are sure of. Don’t let their fear of the unknown become your doubt of what you are certain is what is right for you.
By the way, I’m a little jealous, as a man I can at best leave behind a name on a piece of paper or a screen, not a real person. It’s your life, know that it is worth as much as anyone else’s.
And hey, congratulations!