It has me thinking about that night, and in general that period of my life.
There was never any danger of me dying that night, but I didn’t know that. I thought it would be lethal, and I finally was completely fed up after 5 years of nonstop depression and SI; I was ready to die, at 20 years old. I’d spent five years dealing with depression and SI, as well as psychotic symptoms, suffering in silence. It started when I was a minor, and I knew my dad would not allow me to take meds; he would’ve told me to snap out of it. When I finally did start taking meds he hated it.
Anyway, all I did the night of Jan 15, 2000 was take a box of Unisom and a glass of tequila. I’d heard of people killing themselves with sleeping pills and liquor, didn’t realize those were done with prescription sleeping pills. I just slept for 12 solid hours, woke up briefly, then slept another 4 hours.
But yeah, just thinking and ruminating over these things today and yesterday.
I think it was 2015 when i made my second attempt. I did the same as you - prescribed sleeping pills and a lot of them. Woke up in the hospital much, much later. Thankfully i look back on that day and i’m happy i survived. But i was like you - fed up with the major depression, and developing psychotic symptoms.
Listen up guys, when I had my suicide attempt. That’s actually when I found out I was taking the wrong prescription. I don’t blame the Gastroenterologist, he’s the one that verified I was not receiving the pills he subscribed. I do not blame the pharmacy. The ■■■■■■ up part is that there were two main pharmacist, and one of them did it on purpose so her son could… ah never mind. Recently (about like… 3 years ago?) the dude called and asked for some number. Grrr. Heh.
Oh my suicide attempt, a long time ago. I do not take those ■■■■ muscle relaxants now known as pain killers. They were Percocet. The sad part is that I do most definitely know Doctors are good people and so are the medical assistants and nurses. There is good medicine…