Wrong wrong wrong

Unusual Beliefs
1

Ever since the incident (incident…ha) I’ve felt all wrong. I’ve felt sick. Always sick, sick sick. There’s something really wrong with me, really bad but I don’t know how to stop it. There’s poison in my blood I can’t flush out. Stained stained. The illness, the poison, the whatever is going to eat me up until I’m not me anymore. I keep putting it off but it’s gonna eat me up if I slip for even a second. I don’t want to be evil but I don’t know how to cleanse myself. Filthy filthy. Stained. Disgusting. It’s bad in here. I don’t know how to fix it I don’t know what to do.

I need to go do some destressing to get my head off this.

2

You’ll get over it. I do. YOLO is my motto. ■■■■ the doubters.

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3

What are you talking about, rape or the medications?

4

My head is jelly again I shouldn’t be posting I’m sorry

5

It’s Aight…

6

you should see the doc. or work on changing your thought process

7

Hang tight Anna you seem a little unstable. Just relax, you’ll come out of it. You are a good person negativity should have no hold on you.

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8

obviously not the medications

Daimon is anti meds. It will kill people who need help being like that

9

I am on the medication fool. I was curious if she had started taking meds or something.

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10

Anna comes off as cute with her sponge bob square pants avatar and unstable personality.

11

WOW ok sorry about this guys. Something set me off real bad last night. At least I got myself away from the keys hahaha. Anyways enough of that.

I swear some stuff all you can do is just push down and hope it doesn’t come bubbling back up again. I just don’t know how else to manage.

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12

Nope still not on meds. Something caught me by surprise and sent me into sort of a frenzy. Lovely.

13

I’m in the process of changing pdocs right now actually. Hopefully I’ll like the new one…nervous about it…

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14

When you’re feeling unstable, probably the least harmful thing you can immediately do is post actually. Because we have all been there and we’ve all wanted someone to reach out and help us in those dark times. I hope the new doc can get you on some decent meds that help you stop feeling like that. For me, it helps to be 100% honest with myself about my feelings, because trying to push them down only makes them come back stronger, usually with added hallucinations.

Getting your thoughts down on paper can also help to make them seem more organized and manageable as opposed to an overwhelming storm. Or find a relaxing hobby that is really easy to do, but shifts your focus on to individual steps instead of the panic. I choose baking or cleaning.

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15

Thanks that does make sense. I write a lot to vent I guess. But sometimes when I’m like that it’s best for me to find a way to change my train of thought immediately/distract myself because otherwise I spiral more I think.

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16

No sweat… I’m glad your typing and sometimes… just getting something out of your head helps…

when I first joined… fingers on the keys helped me ignore other things trying to convince me that just one drink… just one joint… what would the harm be… (a lot of harm)

Please don’t feel bad about posting when you need a little support… that’s what a support forum is for right? Glad you feel better today.

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