I’ve come a long way from the young teenager who would read every movment as a sign for my foggy mind to the normal guy in his early twenties who can have a conversation and can blink without thinking that he gave some sort of sign for the pope to start nuking people…
I am “lucky” enough to take a preview every two weeks of what psychosis looks like (because of my depot). It’s the same story, it start as doubting little things at night, the next day it’s all about doubting my family, therapist, random people, my beliefs, my personality, my choices.
The final day before my depot I make my own theories about something as puerile as why I can’t sleep to bigger fish like energetic vampires and how they drain me of my power. My cat is the biggest one btw.
And after I manage to not loose my mind I get my sweet depot and everything is back to normal and I feel good, I’m smiling, I’m happy, I’m dancing in my room and I remember how much I’ve missed it.