How can anyone function like this.
We can be our own worst critics. Trouble is when you have a brain that is overactive and thinks different it becomes a lot more than most have to deal with.
It’s not impossible but your a good person. You need to remind yourself more and I can see by your behavior here that is true. Your kind to others. You help others here and you have always been personable to me in particular.
That stuff translates into real life too. Yeah it’s hard to break that if you’ve been isolating but everyone can do it. Learn to appreciate your good moments and tell yourself you’ve done the best you could do even if it’s a hard situation like with family for example.
Please. Your a good egg. Be kind to yourself.
I try my best but it never seems good enough
Why does my brain seem intent on pushing me over the edge all the time
Maybe just nervous about what the pdoc will say today
As part of our new agreement I have to be honest with the team
But I don’t want to overshare and I have no idea if that’s being dishonest
I just don’t know how much longer I can endure this mental pain and torture
It’s really bad this past week or so, and I am afraid to go up on other meds
I am worried the break in awareness of cause and effect anxiety will be seen as thought disorder
It’s just fragments up there cycling through
Start with exactly this, how you are feeling right now. Maybe and go from here. They should know you’re anxious and fearful of what to share and the more you trust them the more open you can be.
This is a thought disorder. It is okay if they recognize it.
It has got a lot worse
Go up on meds. It’s worth it to think clearly about things and be in reality.
I no longer have a reality, and I am not sure if I can work my way back up without a lot of help
Just a shell
Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m thinking a lot of this is you putting too much pressure on yourself. I think you are your own worst critic.
oh wow, I see rogueone said something similar…i didnt even see that reply until now.
I’m really not trying to be a copycat here. ;p
I feel the same way. Sometimes I really hate myself. It’s part of the illness.
■■■■ man, look at me. If I can do it, you can do it.
Hang in there joker
Yes. This. You put too many expectations on yourself and it’s so common. You have to accept yourself first. Your strengths and weakness’ but be honest with your treatment team moving forward. Be honest about why you are so argumentative. Why you need to fight everyone or certain decisions…we all need to learn to move forward.
I keep telling you to surrender, man. Give up. Stop trying to control this ■■■■■■■ thing. Let go of that and relax. Accept what you can’t change. Make peace with reality. That’s what worked for me…
AA serenity prayer:
“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.”
Said at the end of every AA, CA and NA meeting.
Good luck with your appointment!