Who is attracted to you?

I realize in my 20s I have only attracted women mostly in their late 30s, 40s or early 50s. I have had relationships although non sexual with women in their 50s and 40s. The girl I’m talking to now is 39.

I’m not complaining about this nor am I saying it’s my absolute desire. Maybe I feel more comfortable with older women. Fact is, my mom is 72 so these women don’t seem as old to me as my parents do for example…

My sisters husband is all but 2 months younger than she is but I’ve always felt more comfortable around older ladies but Not too much of an age difference. It’s why I didn’t run off with a 52 year old woman when I had the chance but maybe 39 isn’t too old for me :grimacing:

What’s the main defining trait of whose most attracted to you??

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Usually those attracted to me are lonely people who mistake my kindness for flirt, and only like me because they think I like them :confused:

It sucks. I don’t want to be someone’s anyone, I want people to like me because they genuinely like me, not because they’re lonely and I talk to them.


Does being asexual but still wanting romance but non sexual ones (am I getting that right?) really complicates things for you?

I attract both genders fairly often. Older people and younger people especially. Since i dress and look like a teenager sometimes. I dont look or act my age at all.

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Yes, and it’s very frustrating. Some people clearly only want me because they expect sex, and when they realise they aren’t getting it, they leave.
It hurts, and it annoys me greatly that we’re taught by society from young age that sex means love.
There’s a difference between love and lust.

In the ace community, there’s a world called squish.
If you have a squish on someone, it’s like having a non-sexual crush on their personality, and you want to get to know them better.

I’m hoping one day, someone will have a squish on me for all the right reasons.


My mom would tell me there’s a glove for every hand. And a hand for every glove. Or something. Good luck on your squish :blush:


When I was in my mid 20s I was dating a woman 15 years older than me. I think an age gap is less of an issue when your younger and can keep up with each other. But when you get older one of you starts to slow down, and one wants to keep going

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Yeah that does sound like it could be an issue if you were gonna get older together. The woman I’m talking with is exactly ten years older than me. I know I’m gonna be hiking as long as I can. She seems to be in good shape for her age and likes to be outdoors too. Well I’d worry about whatever when whatever happens. For now I definitely prefer a girl 5-10 years older than me. It never goes well with a woman my own age . Thanks @mikev0882

So 5-10 years from now will you be attracted to gils the same age as you?:thinking:

I’m not sure @Drug-Slug

I’d like to hope I fall in love and stay in love.

I used to like younger girls when I was in school but now I’ve had only relationships with girls a bit older than me when I’m 23-29 years old

Nobody’s ever attracted to me that I know of. Maybe four or five people have found me attractive my entire life, and I wasn’t interested back except for once, and it was a pretty short run.

I don’t consider it important. I’ll try to date after I move and hopefully my personality can get me a partner who is interested. They just have to look past the fact that I’m on federal disability.

I don’t want to die without a shot at having kids and I’m getting old.


Maybe you’re not putting yourself out there enough. It’s tough for me too. But I think you are an attractive looking guy but maybe you’re shy like me. Not too many opportunities. I haven’t either. I’ve gone on dates with two women I met in the psych ward lol I don’t know where else I’d meet people bsck then. I did hang out with a girl from a volunteer job a bit. And now the girl I’ll meet this weekend was from online dating. This would be my 3rd online date ever probably.

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With only one chance you got more chances than a few man ever had. Count yourself a lucky boy.


I think your personality is captivating. I’m constantly going awwwww or laughing. I have no doubt that you’ll find that special someone. Just saying. :upside_down_face:


My Lovely Nieghbour Debs is attracted to me upstairs. Its a funny kind of relationship we have. She flirts, but shes too sweet and innocent with her Learning issues to ever take it seriously. I see her more as a sister really. We usually say goodnight on the stairs at night after catching up on gossip. Its nice to feel loved tho.

I would be gutted if she left.


İ was really popular kid at my neighborhood and i still thinking about why? But after teenager i become less attractive. İ don t think anybody would attractive to me and i don t really care. İ m done with this existence.

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Hang in there @Ocean-spray

I was a real lame uncool kid. In my own fantasy world. Then my two worlds collided it created schizophrenia. I’m still not cool but some people like me. Be proud of who u r.


I attract everyone!



I must be dating myself but what community is the ace community?


Iam attracted to women in their 20’s,30’s and 40’s iam 40 believe it! but younger women in their 20’s mainly seem attracted to me tbh

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