Schizophrenia.com

Who here is/was an alcoholic?

#1

I used to be a raging alky. I drank heavily every night. I put whiskey in my coffee in the mornings. I have been sober for a few months, I got drunk for the first time in a long time in late February. It’s finals week and I have 4 finals within 24 hours starting in three hours, and I woke up in the middle of the night feeling anxious and restless and starting chugging. I found myself right where I was a year ago, drinking on my back porch at 3am, and made myself vomit every bit of it right back out.

Who here is/was an alcoholic, and how did you overcome it?

Im considering AA because I will be 21 soon. My friends buy me booze now but they watch how much I drink and make sure im not having more than a drink a night- they drink, but they’re not alcoholics. Well one of them is borderline alcoholic. Ok no he is an alcoholic. He has a heart condition, has has had multiple open heart surgeries and has a pacemaker and takes meds to stay alive. I don’t blame him, I’ve never asked but I assume his life expectancy is shorter than the average person’s.

But I caught myself this morning before getting drunk before finals- which would have been ■■■■■■■ ugly- but I am feeling like I might just relapse completely once I can legally buy liquor. I still think about alcohol when I am stressed, and sometimes I just wish I was still an alcoholic, I was numb to everything back then, I didn’t care or get stressed- the only thing that worried me was getting my hands on more liquor. I am signed up for summer classes and they’re gonna suck, and I am worried about relapsing, I nearly relapsed this morning, I mean I did but I immediately changed my mind and made myself projectile vomit.

and here’s a little known fact- pure vanilla extract is 90 proof. You can buy a fifth-sized bottle of it, at least I did and wasnt carded. It causes gastrointestinal distress but it gets the job done. I drank a whole bottle of it one time and had terrible cramps and diarrhea but I was too drunk to care.

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#2

Stay away from the booze dude. I went through a very bad patch a few years ago. It was really awful. The alcohol took the pain away for a bit - but it never really solves any problems.

I was told that if I felt the urge to drink - to have a Mars bar instead. The cravings you get for alchol - can simply be your body craving sugar. If you have a chocolate bar instead - the cravings will get lessened/go away altogether.

I have to say Mortimer - I really enjoy your posts.

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#3

I’ve been battling my cravings off and on for years. I’ve been sober for 6 years and even to this day stuff will trigger a craving. It doesn’t help that my brother who is one year younger keeps giving me Irish whiskey as a gift. He knows it’s my favorite for all the wrong reasons.

I started drinking when I was about 13-14 to calm down and not be so hyper, and it made the voices happy. What I was hearing in my head was happy and silly stuff when I was drunk, not hateful, self-destructive stuff.

My alcoholism and my drug use brought on my down fall and that caused my very real suicide attempt.

I do go to AA. Most of my AA group is also in my Sz support group so sometimes we all forget are we here to talk Alcoholism, or SZ ? It’s all good these days. I have help and some inner strength to keep this under control.

Sober 6 years and sometimes out of the blue my brain will scream for a drink. A smell of pipe tobacco that I use when I used to drink, will make me crave, a place where I used to happily drink, will make me crave, Smelling whiskey on someone will make me crave.

For me it’s a lot like SZ. There are ways to live around this problem, there are ways to beat this problem, but it’s just always still there, even when one thinks it’s not.

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#4

homeless alcoholic age 23, took me to a very bad place havent drank now for a year and a half and my effots have now been rewarded today i was offered CBT therpay yipeeeee!

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#5

as a teenager i was , i used to hide bottles the empty ones and full ones in my cupboards, and then i tried to kill my self drinking a bottle of whiskey, nearly died, i was 15 mins from being brain dead, good times !!
take care
p.s i don’t drink now…

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#6

I loved to drink, but the personal cost was too high. I haven’t had a drink for many years, and I call myself an alcoholic.

I asked my counselor recently for a definition of an alcoholic, and he said it is not a professional term that therapists use to describe a patient . He said he breaks it down into stuff like “alcohol dependence” and “alcohol abuse” and so forth.

As a teenager and young adult, I was tryanized by a bunch of caring. I cared what you thought of me, and I cared what grades I got, and I cared that I might accidentally get someone pregnant; yet when I drank, I wasn’t uncomfortable about all those things. When I drank, I felt good.

A singer named Frank Zappa crooned my war cry in one of his songs, “I don’t care if she shaves her legs. Smother that girl in chocolate syrup and eat her 'til the cows come home.”

The problem with me was that the caring always returned when I sobered up. I did care about how my failures would impact my Mother. I did care that I was headed for an early grave. I did care that I’d pissed in the sink the night before instead of the toilet!

It was easy for me to stop drinking. I just acted for the next many years as if the most important decision in my life was to stay sober.

Jayster

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