Believing I was god.
so tough to choose
truman show/ about to be beheaded by an axe murderer and cut up etc and things like that were just as scary
equally scary is just being mind read with paranoia from the rest of the hospital
one second when i believed my stomach had split off from my oesophagus and peanuts were ending up between my ribs- one second of terror
i’d only drink pot noodle liquid and sweet chilli dipping sauce after that for a short time and had 3 x 30 minute cold showers a day in winter (for weeks) to lower my body temperature because i thought i had a fever and this was end stage cancer and i’d live longer
gave myself hypothermia, frequently- wet my clothes blanket etc or jacket and went out in the cold
then went back to being more water polydipsic etc etc
I thought I was going to be burned alive like in the Wicker Man. I ended up having a freak out in my college class and wrote this guy a poem about how my screams would make him my child. ■■■■ was ■■■■■■■ wild. Honestly if I watched that movie now I would laugh, but at the time I was convinced it was real.
bear with me, first of all, I didn’t think I had an actual body but was a laser Jesus put there inside the dvd reader so that I could have a spirit…catch is, the computer was on a spaceship headed for fire lake on a 1,000 years away on a one way ticket, so it was 1,000 years back before I could get back to Heaven where I would receive my body. long story short…it was a nightmare of the worst caliber to believe you didn’t actually exist but were a reader on a two year time loop designed by the devil full of tortures by doctors, grizzly bears, and dentists…
I was admitted one time for suicide attempt but sitting in the hospital room i had the delusion enemies were attacking and being intercepted and i heard necks being snapped and bones breaking. I was the protected target and i remember being afraid they would overwhelm the defences and get me. That was around 2010.
In 2015 i had the delusion i was being poisoned through the air vents and water supply too
I work through that…
You mean you are doing a job at the same time?
Wow, well done…
You have my support…
No, I mean people turning into devils
Although it’s not exactly devils with me…
More like people are possessed
I’m sorry to hear that. It is really challenging experience
It comes in waves, so I can kind of deal with it. Plus, their behaviour is just weird rather than frightening. They just say odd things,and make symbols and things
Really, behaviour depends on who I am speaking to. It varies.
How long have you had the delusion?
Well, had it for about 2/3 weeks, which was, in the main, very manageable, as it was just increased anger towards me and the odd weird thing being said. But it did peak for about 3/4 days where full on weirdness ensued.
I’m always pretty calm throughout. If I could give a tip it would be that. Just remain calm.
Thanks for the advice. I’ll keep that in mind if it happens again.
Isn’t it weird how delusion behaviour of ppl tends to be bizarre
Like the way hallucinations act I mean
There are other things that happen to me, but I’m not allowed to talk about them. Silly forum rules. Seems bizarre that you can’t talk about experiences on a schizophrenic forum
Yes, it’s other people that seem mad during episodes… Make of that what you will people.
Being killed while I sleep.