I’ve been having after images colour patches furniture breathing and distorting. Voices and distressing thoughts. Feeling like I don’t want to do any thing What’s yours?
Have you talked to your doctor about this?
Yes I have they want to put me in hospital but I don’t want to go.
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Maybe you should, because it will get a lot a lot worse 
I’ve had some bad experiences in hospital if I go this would probably be my 30th admission in 2 and a half years.
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The nurses are nasty.
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do you have someone to take care of you at least? are you currently on medication?
I’m at respite and moving to supported accommodation soon. I stopped my clozapine 2 weeks ago.
Ummm for psychosis I can usually tell something is up when my paranoia starts coming back at night. For depression I know an episode is starting when suddenly everything becomes extremely difficult and overwhelming.
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Mine is not getting enough sleep, hearing mumbling voices, seeing things that aren’t there, getting paranoid that everyone hates me, getting over emotional, dragging around my apartment and feeling exhausted, hearing music hallucinations. For depression, I know something is up when I start feeling like I don’t want to live anymore.
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Yeah @Gina2 I usually can’t cry but I’ve been very emotional and irritable I hate it
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I start thinking people are trying to force me to have sexual relationships I do not want. I get really angry about it.
In years past, I used to cry. Nowadays, I can’t cry anymore. I don’t know why. I don’t know what caused the change in me. I never get emotional any more. Ever since all these people in my family died, (a total of four of them in my immediate family), I have not had the ability to cry. I guess it is just a protective mechanism.
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Sorry to hear that. I lost my boyfriend to suicide and I barely cried. I think it is a defence mechanism like you say and maybe some of the illness.
My body gets tenser and tenser. I relapse into a different mind from my usual. Caught then in a vicious circle. Words have an entirely different meaning and are couched in an entirely different language from my usual. I lose control of my thinking. Very witty language but it all revolves around me. There isn’t anyone else.
Getting up at 8:00 am in the hospital for breakfast then art class afterwards.
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Jumbled thoughts like my mind is being taken over by Alien. Anxiety and deadness. Self harm urges.
Hi gina I don’t cry anymore either , it’s like I can’t . I have zero emotion and I used to be really emotional !!! I am on medication so maybe that stops me ?
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My first relapse symptoms are social anxiety , avoidance of people I know . Fear of all sorts , cars , death , sleep problems , etc . Then the positive symptoms come .
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