What's the most nonsensical things your voices have said or delusions you've had?

Mine was probably thinking I could communicate with aliens when I never got responses and voices once told me I was the universe but they said it a mumbled mush or code so it was more interpretation than what they said but they often talk to me like that. Just wondered what the most nonsensical thing that was said to you or what thoughts you had/have?

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They said i was the universe as well, that i am it and it is me, which is true in a way. Is that good, not in my opinion.

My first visual hallucination was of an “alien” grey, my mind seemed to become flooded with info that was horrible and then a few minutes later i saw an “alien”, it didn’t look physical though, i try to think back to describe it in detail but wouldn’t you know it it’s a little fuzzy! How wierd! I just can’t seem to remember the details!

After whats happened i know it’s someone, just have to find out who and why now, although im not sure that i really want to or should.

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maybe the alien matched the level of knowledge you were receiving at the moment…?
My voices speak to me like that a lot, though that level is up there with divine knowledge.

Anyways, the tv told me I am The Returning Player…aka Jesus

I had this delusion that everyone was listening to the music I was playing in my car on their radio…that was probably my most nonsensical delusion. It was very far-fetched.

but funny! I thought everyone could here my thoughts and they would tell me about it and laugh at me. People would respond in various way… I was far gone

i think the most nonsensicle one was that all my family were clones and that i had built them in a spacetime ship in order for me to b born…stupid huh. i didn’t believe in it but it disturbed me greatly as i could hear all their voices telling me they hated me for building them and controlling their lives. it lasted probably about 6 months in total, 3 weeks of which were spent in hospital where i also heard all of the other patients and staffs voices. it was awfull. obviously i don’t believe in it but it was disturbing nonetheless. i really lost it completely but now i understand why i don’t think it could happen again. i’ve got too much experience now to go off the deep end i think…famous last words huh. lol

There was this alien face in my shower curtain who had a long pointy chin and a sideways mouth. I stared at it for awhile and then it said to me “you’ve been a wafer to long” …hehehe.

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One of the voices said “I don’t think she’s the slightest bit insane.” Lol

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Another one was that my son was the immaculate conception through out of body sex. I laugh at the thought of it now. I was such a mess back then lol

My scariest delusion happened when I was stoned. I thought I had to kill my mother because it already happened and otherwise the space time continuum would shatter. If there hadn’t been a small ounce of me that didn’t believe it I know I would have done it. One of my other delusions was that I had snakes in my stomach. I considered swallowing puppy dewormer which was when my doc put me in the hospital. It was right before my birthday so I told them I didn’t believe that anymore, which wasn’t true, and was discharged. Eventually the delusion went away and was probably replaced with another one.

My worst was when every person, place, or thing was a slimy monster set on killing me, haven’t felt that way in a long time, thank God!

Had one where I thought I created time travel!
Im black and had a white girlfriend at the time, our couple friends were also a black girl and a white boy. I thought that we were stuck in a paradox where everyone descended from us. :0

I once thought that my favorite porno actress was watching me and making fun of me…that’s pretty sad but that happened. I remember smoking pot one night with my friends (I was drunk so I was like “lemme take a hit”) and then I could feel her watching me through the window and reading my thoughts. Not a pleasant feeling, way too much subconscious guilt just for having an orgasm if you ask me. That’s probably the most nonsensical, insane thing ive ever experienced.

I like being able to realize that it was just crazy and laugh about it. At the time I couldn’t sleep because of it.

I used to think I had psychic powers and could make girls like me using telepathy.

I had that one. That I somehow got a spirit pregnant and a baby would be on the way. The spirit took up a human body to have the baby. Odd, made no sense. But my head was far away from lucid at the time.

“French tower pancakes driving on the cold hard shoulder!” Blurted out in the middle of a manic meltdown. I’m still quite fond of that one.

My earliest and most fond delusion was believing that a family of tiny little wooden telegraph poles were living inside the top of the wooden telegraph pole out the front of our house. To this day part of me still believes they’re up there doing there little wooden-family thing. Always makes me chuckle.

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“You have a voices problem… hearing them.” It was quite funny actually I kinda was expecting that answer but it was still surprising.

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I thought people were trying to get me to commit suicide. I was really flipped out about it. I bought a .22 automatic handgun. I wasn’t going to go in some place and open up, or anything like that, but if somebody had walked up behind me in the dark I might have turned around and shot them.

When I was 16 and first started hearing voices, they were strong, telling me to do things. I went on a ski trip with a group of my friends that one of the parents had organized, i was on the ski lift and the voices were saying jump, go ahead jump, over and over. I felt that i was supposed to and by the time i did the lift was already at 30 feet, so I jumped. That is how i hurt my back so badly.

I don’t have voices anymore but I used to think I heard God talking to me (Jesus) and I thought He was having fun with me by telling me to first take off my shirt and go pick flowers off the bush in the front yard. I did that and when I got back in the house I thought I heard Him say “now take off your pants and pick flowers” so I did. and then I begged him to not make me take off my boxers. He didn’t. man, I’m glad I"m not insane anymore !!