This is a tough one. I’m googling and I can’t come up with any right search pharase. The thing is, I am (apparently) being psychologically mistreated by my uncle and my father since I was a teenager and have ruined my self esteem (and now that makes even somewhat senes to me) and I have been completely blind to it and I have been loving them as my father and uncle. apparently my mother have been seeing this all the time and has been trying to tell me about this but i have been deaf to her also. (which has suddenly changed. now I SEE)
The other thing is that generally, I can’t see it when people are mean to me (unless they are laying and swearing at me). Or when people are in a bad mood. like i get dissociation or get distracted suddenly. or mind mind changes its subject. this has also changed somewhat.
all this has changed to a small degree because my mother tried, in a very very fool proof way, to give me examples about how my uncle and my father have treated my in the past. and then the lights went on, to some minute degree.
Now I need to know what this is called to read about it or get help about it and do whatever necessary. so I would appreciate the English speaking folks to help me out here.