What hurt you the most?

Most people have pain from childhood, what hurt you the most? Have you been able to forgive and move on?

Some of it I can forgive. I never thought about forgiving other parts of it.

1 Like

something I am still fighting with. Certain things were easy to forget. Some things have stuck with me for years… non end of resentment. I resent a lot of people.

1 Like

To this day I have no idea


I had a great childhood even though I was symptomatic even back then. We never had much money but plenty of love and affection. Can’t complain about anything!


my father leaving the family to go shack up with a woman in Nevada…we lived in poverty and then when my father figured out that his new woman wouldn’t put him through med school he begged my mom to go back to him…I was 13 at the time and the only one old enough to know and understand what my dad did…I became rebellious and we often fought while growing up…now a days my dad and me aren’t speaking…that hurts. I was the last to reach out and say I love you but he never answered.


I think the thing that hurt the most was how all the kids, teachers, and other people’s parents thought I was dumb and would go nowhere and did not mind making that clear to me. This is mostly because I am a very slow reader and bad at everything verbal and people related (probably some sort of undiagnosed learning disability). My reading is so slow that it does not sound fluent when I read out loud. Very broken up, etc.

I have been told on numerous occasions that I should be ashamed of myself for my reading fluency issues. Also getting called to read in class was really bad.

And worst of all, they would not let me move ahead in math and science because of my reading issues. I am very good at math and science and would often ask for a more advanced class. The teachers all said no to it. How can you be a teacher and tell a kid that they can’t learn?!?!

The bullying was really bad too. I had very few real friends and often people that I thought were real friends were not. They would back stab me and join the bullies.

How do I forgive all this? I can’t. The best I can do is make sure my kids don’t have to go through this. I think moving to California from Maryland was a very good start. Here there don’t seem to be as many bullies and the teachers are more accepting.


Probably my birth father choosing heroin over his kids over and over. And him neglecting me when I was a baby while he pawned all my mothers things for drug money. (She was away working since he couldn’t get a job, she would send home money but he’d spent it on drugs)

When she came home to a hungry crying baby with a very dirty diper, no food, jewelry, microwave, tv, anything- and my dad high out of his mind, she took me, left and never came back.

He could have gotten better though, but he chose to stay on heroin and eventually died of an OD.

And now I have to see my brother struggle with heroin, and my sister with crack. Because of him. (They’re older then me so they remember it all)

That’s supposedly where my trauma stems from, but I don’t remember it since I was a baby. But I guess it could be embedded into my subconscious.

Who knows.


I find it very easy to forgive since we all make mistakes and regret certain things we ourselves have done. But just because I can easily forgive someone doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt me or that I can let go of it from my memory. But knowing what it is like to be human helps me understand other’s mistakes as well. Plus, as a Christian I always been taught to forgive others their sins against me… but some things take me longer to forgive. Usually I’m over something in a few days… but at most, a few months. The pain of it may never truly go away but the blame and resentment I felt towards that person does.


To be totally honest, my father being somewhat ashamed of my illness. Sometimes I think he wishes he never had me, because I’m a reminder of his bad genetics which he tried to sweep under the rug when he decided to have children. I think he looks at me as something of a failed experiment, that cuts deep.

But I don’t give a ■■■■ about him, he has no idea what I’m worth.

It also hurts when I see normies doing stuff I can’t, that makes me resentful of them. I feel totally disconnected from their world since I developed schizophrenia and started on meds. I feel like an alien dropped on a distant planet where everyone is so cognitively sharp and hyper-emotional. So in a way, the pain of having the illness and being on medication which removes my emotional capacity hurts. While I can feel all the negative emotions, the positive ones are much less intense. Maybe its the illness, but I think more likely the medication.


Completely relate to this.

Sorry about your dad. I’m glad you realize that he’s wrong about you.


I heard one woman on the internet say that forgiveness in some cases doesn’t so much mean dismissing the way a person hurt you as not obsessing on it any more. You don’t have to think highly of your father, but it would only help you if you forgot about him as much as you can.


Being sexually assaulted when I was ten. Alcoholic father who’d chew my sister and I out the morning after over something stupid like a few dishes in the sink or going hungry during school lunches. Two backstabbing friends who weren’t my friends.

My best employer gave me some advice I keep in mind to this day. Assume nothing, trust no one.

1 Like

Yeah that makes sense, I agree.

How I deal with it is I realize that my father was only human. After seeing my siblings go through addiction (and experiencing it myself) I know how hard that can be. I can’t blame him, I’m sure that he loved me. He just loved drugs more.


My parents put a roof over our heads and fed us, but as far as parents go they failed at everything else, was brutal life as they beat down our self esteem daily, and beating there was. I was hard to handle as a child and back in my day there was no treatment, they just tried to beat you into behaving. Stubborn as I was it never worked on me and I left family behind at the age of 18 and never went back.
Any comments from people were " you are making your parents feel like they failed" Looking back at my age they did, badly. and yes it hurt


(((((((((((hug)))))))))))) if you need one

1 Like

I have a bad autobiographic memory and therefore there is nothing hurting me even if my childhood wasn’t easy. :slight_smile:

1 Like

then that’s a blessing

1 Like

My parents using any tactic they could think of to meditate me. Mainly just by overpowering me and forcing pills down my throat. But they also snuck them into my food. The side effects were so bad I was convinced that the pills were poison but they wouldn’t stop forcing them on me.

I have forgiven them for the most part they were just trying to help… But I am bitter that they don’t admit fault they don’t seem to feel any guilt for It. But I don’t let it consume me anymore.

I still will never forgive my pdoc from that time though

1 Like

I had a very happy childhood. I guess what hurt me the most was the belt whip cause i stole money.

1 Like