So I am doing really well. Volunteering, dating, going to school full time, but I can’t get over the anxiety that I am going to relapse. I have been relapse free for 2 years but I can’t get it out of my head. I want to work full time and move out but I feel like it is never going to happen.
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If the progress you’ve made is real you won’t relapse unless there is some trauma that triggers it. By real progress I mean that you understand the condition that caused the breakdown and have eliminated the cause from your life. The cause might be as simple as erroneous thinking.
If you are going to school full time you don’t need to be thinking about working full time. It’s too much. You can take your time. Be patient. You’ll get there in time. You’re still young, you’ll have all those things you want when you’re done with school and it doesn’t have anything to do with you relapsing. If you pile on too much at one time you may well set yourself up for a relapse, you never know.
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sounds like you’re doing really well & high functioning Air.
I actually find work much easier than study. The work load & deadlines were much more manageable & there wasn’t endless, huge amounts of reading to do anymore. Plus you get paid! I’m in my mid 40’s and nothing in my life has been so difficult & stressful as full time study. So you may be pleasantly surprised when you start working.
The only hard thing about work was the requirements to interact socially & to maintain relationships with colleagues & managers. When I was studying I could be very withdrawn & introverted & nobody noticed or cared. In contrast, I found the workplace to be quite socially demanding. But if you’re good with people you should be fine.
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This is a great question. Since then have you found something that helped? I was really concerned last week but everything seems ok. Still, I was in a meeting at work today and feeling spacey and all of a sudden I felt panicked – is this symptoms coming on?
I figure time really helps with relapse anxiety and success too – in relationships and in career. I also feel reassured that there’s people that I see regularly that know about my psychosis and support me.
Where are you now? Did you decide to move out?
I’m still at home, finishing up my bachelors and preparing for a masters. this helped me https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/pieces-mind/201207/radical-acceptance
Congratulations!
And thanks, that’s a good reminder. Any experience to share on how radical acceptance worked specifically with relapse anxiety?
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It helps me to take a moment and relax myself while freaking out about going psychotic to remind myself that it is just something I can not change, just manage. I also remind myself that I made it through 2 years of florid psychosis and homelessness, and I can make it through whatever life throws again.
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