Weird thing

I remember being sick at age 19 and 20 and trying to figure out what was going on with me. I spent a lot of time poring over my childhood in my mind, analyzing myself and looking for some type of epiphany. Picking incidents out of my growing up to see where I went wrong. I was always thinking, “Where did I go wrong”? Then I use to drag out the families photo album and look at all the picture of myself at different times of my childhood to see where the turning point was. I looked at a picture of myself as a baby and I thought I could see in my eyes (in the picture) that I had signs of schizophrenia when I was a year or two old. I used to obsess with this. For months and maybe even a year I would look at pictures of myself and try to figure myself out.

I’ve done that too. I’ve pondered and wondered… when did ADAD become Sz…

It came on so slow… until it was so big it seemed sudden.