I wasn’t gong to post because I’m afraid of sounding like a broken record. But I need some encouragement today, the voices have been at it since last night and they’re starting to finally get to me. They’re telling me the same old things that I’m worthless, I have no talent and so on and so forth. I know they’re just voices, but it’s hard to ignore them after so much persistence.
Last night I managed to write what I thought was a decent one sentence paragraph of my story, I was so happy and delighted with it last night. Tonight I’m thinking it’s lame and I’m wasting my time with this story of mine. Now I’m getting the strong urge to follow the images the voices are showing me of getting a knife. I don’t want to do this but I hate when I feel this way.
Okay I’m not going to hurt myself, but the voices are pushing me towards that direction. I have too much to live for. I know my parents love me, I have my kitty who needs me to take care of her. I do have a very strong desire to become a published author before I die. I’m afraid if I do give into my voices that I’d damn my soul to hell for committing suicide though part of me wants to believe that God would be forgiving, I’m not ready to find that out in person though.
I don’t know. I just need to hear some nice things that aren’t from my family. Maybe if shared the synopsis with everyone here I could get some advice that isn’t just from the voices in my head? It won’t make the voices go away but if I have back up from non family members it’s always a big encouragement.
SYNOPSIS: She believes is a horror/occult novel about an atheist who becomes the target, of an evil soul collecting demon, and she must decide to fight for her soul or be enslaved and tortured for an eternity.
i’m sorry i can’t read all of that just now but i just wanted sat that i have never admitted to hearing voices as i don’t think that is the best description of it, i usually refer to things like that as intrusive thoughts. getting them a bit tonight but coping ok, took my med and i’m tired so will go to sleep and dream then wake up as if it never happened lol.
Sounds interesting. I like the theme. Although I’m mostly atheist.
As for the voices, I’m sorry your going through that. I struggle with mine at times as well. Do your best to stay distracted. It’s excellent you have a novel to work on. It probably gives you a lot to think about. We’re all here for you sohare. Try and take it easy.
wish ii could makee thhem stop:) sendiinng love.
you hit the nail right on the head hunni. they’re just voices. they can’t hurt you and can only depress you if you let them. i do not let my voices get to me, whatever they say and they say some pretty disgusting things to me most of the time. ■■■■ em. you like to write, i like to write. trust your inner voice about your writing, not the voices. i don’t set time limit’s on my writing and to be quite honest i don’t give a ■■■■ if i get a deal or not as i can always self publish on kindle. so i may not earn a bean out of it, so what? it’s the accomplishment that counts. don’t think about getting published, just write. doesn’t matter whether it’s brilliant one day, crap the next as you can always go back over it. it also doesn’t matter how long it takes you either. don’t let the ■■■■■■■ voices get to you hunni. do what you enjoy and stick to it. hope this helps xx
A friend took her life a few years ago. As it heads towards to what would of been her birthday this month I’ve been lighting two candles. One in memory of her and one for anyone else struggling. I’ve lit the candles a few minutes ago so am already sending good vibes your way. I hope things will settle quickly for you and you will be in my thoughts
heres an idea,
is there a point in your life , maybe it is now that you have felt worthless or not talented? maybe due to the illness? if that is the case you could try to work on a more positive mindset.
Tell yourself : I am Worth it
Think of even the smallest of things you are good at and just remind yourself of those little good memories.
Even if you cant get rid of the voices right now ,
This might help to change your voices from persecuting voices to more helpful and nuturing voices.
just an idea.
When i couldn’t get rid of my voices for a while I just made friends with them the best i could , and anytime i figured out they were trying to be sneaky or say something bad i would just tell them i was on to them and that i knew what they were up to. they would just reply with a #%$K Off. and then theyd quiet down.
okay, just an update…I’m doing somewhat better these past couple days. The voices have quieted down some. I’ve found a new book to help me with my writing and I think it will help. I’m going to attempt a 3rd re-write using this book and another one I found helpful.
I made one major change to my story, I never liked the demon’s name and changed it. I’m still testing out the new name in my head, I have it down but I don’t know how well I like this one, it’s swimming around in my head as I read it.
im glad your doing better keep up the good work:)
First three steps in the snowflake method are complete…I took a bit longer than they suggested on the time, but who cares, I’m quite pleased with my work so far. I’m answering some questions I was asking about my own work. I think that’s the most important thing.