My mantra is about forgiveness. I feel like a hypocrite, I do not forgive my mom for her neglect and my missed opportunities.
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I’m really bad at forgiveness too. But I certainly won’t forgive anyone who’s not sorry.
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I realized after writing this that my voices are unforgiving and vengeful, blaming me for all my missed pleasures.
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It is not necessary to forgive if your hate doesn’t consume you. It is possible to live a life where you can dismiss the past without it having to control your present. This helps if you can’t actually forgive properly. It certainly helps me.
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I forgive
cos i forget
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My voices hate me for never having girlfriends, a job, etc., etc. Who else are they going to hate? Themself? I am he. I have not been in touch with myself since I got ill, so I just never knew I cared. Now my Self is my ego( egotistical )and I now have a new Self. I have proved unworthy of myself by my bad sportsmanship. I am the new me and I have won.
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That’s awful that the voices “hate you”.
I agree with labratmat.
I hope, if your on medication, that is starts helping you feel better.
If your not on medication; I hope these voices that your having, become a “forgiving” type.
Best of luck to you, @Jinx .
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Medicine has never helped with hallucinations. It just makes the feelings better. I think I repressed a lot of things and they became my shadow self and that’s my voices. But I do believe my true self was replaced along with it. I proved myself unworthy.
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Sometimes, you need to have the “feeling better”, sensation; to heal or move forward.
By what you say, you were “replaced for proving yourself unworthy”; would be great to start a talk with a therapist.
Therapy might be a good avenue, since you don’t take medication.
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I struggle with forgiveness very much myself. My mom for emotional neglect, but even more so the insurance companies that screwed me for 7 years. It’s very hard to forgive someone, when they genuinely mean you harm on purpose
Just when I think I’ve Let It Go finally, something reminds me of it and I’m pissed off again. It’s a tough go for sure
I read somewhere that forgiveness is not like pounding a gavel, and pronouncing someone innocent. You have to forgive them over, and over, and over again
I take an anti psychotic/ mood stabilizer, anti anxiety med, an antidepressant, and a med for side effects. I am very sick, I could not live long without medication.
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I think its ok to feel like that.
I too have hallucinations regardless of meds and dosage.
Its like a part of me.
But I try as much as I can to stay focused on being in peace.
I had girlfriends,and you missed nothing.
Just try hard not to let hallucinations defeat you,like me.
I cant do a single thing without a voice.
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I have always been too forgiving. The only thing I will ever thank the voices for is that they help me not be so forgiving at times.
Usually I feel upset for a few days and work on whatever happened to me, and then I reach forgiveness. I think that is my personality.
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Forgiveness is not for the one who’s forgiven but for the one who forgives. I would try to forgive your mom you will find that by forgiving her you will set yourself free.
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I’ve heard that forgiveness isn’t a matter of suddenly feeling love for the person who hurt you, but just a matter of not obsessing on the wrong they did to you. When you obsess over past wrongs they are taking up space in your head and not paying rent.
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I appreciate your comments, especially the last two. I feel like my spirituality is on hold now that I know for sure I resent my mom. No one ever said I had to forgive absolutely everything, but I always felt it very important. I don’t know what to do, except take a very long break from talking to my mom on the phone.
I forgive my mother. It’s hard to forgive strangers whose hobby is harming you always.
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