Trying to appear normal but inside feel disconnected from whats going on in life, feel numb no emotions 
its difficult being like this. Zoned out all the time
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The bullies won last week when i took my depot. Never again, this is no life for me id prefer to be off meds. I don’t care if i lose half my benefits i really don’t. Sick of this and all meds do this to me so theres no point trying different meds
Have you tried clozapine?
I was treatment resistant before it
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Yea the words chemical straight jacket come to mind , no thanks lol
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It’s like this:
Stay on meds and work it out,
OR,
Go off meds, lose your mind, probably your marriage and maybe your home.
Stop focusing on getting off meds and start pulling your life together.
The best way to get off meds is to do well on them.
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Its like this
The best way to sort my life out is to come off meds
And nope i wouldn’t lose anything if i came off them as they only hinder me
Anyways
Okay,
Well, I don’t think you’ll be able to get off meds anyway,
So I’m not too worried.
I totally understand you @anon29983254. I do not say to stay off meds, but depot cand be very harsh. Try to speak to your doctor to find different solution.
Getting off depot comes with some sort of depression I am on…
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Don’t give up, you will never know what is going to happen in the future. Something positive might happen in the future. For example, I am in a group home, and it has helped me. It hasn’t completely helped me, but it has helped me.
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My depot isn’t harsh at all. Sometimes It feels a little sore after it’s done, but that eases off very quickly.
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Oh ok what dose are you on?
The lowest therapeutic dose.
Oh ok thats probably why it doesn’t have much strength if you’re on lowest dose
Depends on the depot and how you respond to it. For me all top of the body was in tension, lots of tension. I was restless, meaning i felt like laying down and next thing standing up and felt like laying down again. My body could not settle for any position. My insight feelings were fear, lots of fear and anger, like my soul was trapped. On the outside I was like a robot - zombified, but inside I was screaming.
@anon29983254 I hope they find a different med that works for you
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It has enough strength to do a reasonably good job at keeping me sane and stable.
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I can relate yes for sure
Well i don’t intend to try a different med
That reminds me of my 1st psych admission. Heavy doses of typical antipsychotic with sod all for the side effects.
Yeah, totally useless.was the first time I got those and my body went into such a weak body shape.
I feel sorry for @anon29983254 if they gave her heavy dose. Heavy dosage doesn’t feel like treatment, but more as punishment.
I don’t know
These discussions keep cropping up in my mind and i feel like its all or nothing with me, black or white i can’t help it. Whenever i think about my numbness and my weight i want to fix it, fix me and the only thing i can change is my meds so i focus on the meds. Actually i spoke to husband for an hour and he is adament i need the meds and should accept i was too dysfunctional off them. I have to accept i guess but these thoughts do come up often. I hate this
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Most people think SZs should be on medication, even if we don’t like how the medications make us feel.
If you go off them, you will have to deal with a lot of people doubting you for making that decision. Still, it is your decision.