Hi fellows. Understanding people by staring at them and reading their minds is my nature from childhood itself, no matter who they are. But this nature has ruined my life because of people take that wrong or think in their own meaning. If anybody gets interest about you or think about you, let it be anything at that moment, do you people can recognize that right? I do have some faults. Wherever I go, I want proper attention on me. If people show attitude or get jealous on me, I make them to pay attention. This nature has destroyed whole my life and unfortunately, I have been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. I do not get hallucinations, but have some strong beliefs that people are about me always and they are watching me and my family and making troubles.
Because of this disease, I could not understand my very much loved girlfriend and for my fate, the disease started affecting me just at the beginning of our love, so I could not understand her or what was happening and didn’t know about the disease itself, in fact, I come to know about this disease nearly about 5 years later, the time my love was completely gone.
Originally DXed as disorganized schizophrenia. Then had Asperger’s Syndrome added (now called high-functioning autism). DX for SZ was eventually moved to paranoid schizophrenia as my stability improved and I stopped going catatonic when highly symptomatic.
Thanks Daze. It’s almost 13 years since we got into fight and being separated. We both have ego, so got married to different partners. But still she is my universe and will always be loving more than I did when we were together. And she is leading happy life without me, so why should I disturb her, but I want to make her understand all this happened because of my disease. I can only say she can only make my life more beautiful. It really hurts to see my life without her. Thanks anyway for your words.