This memories came with my first psychotic breakdown, I remember lots of things that I know never happened. I remember I commit a murder, a friendship with a non existing person and two sexual abuses. I remember my grandpa touching me, and something worse in school, but when I asked my mom about the school case she told me that I was never abused, what happened was totally different and was something like bullying but not a abuse. So these memories are false memories, Its hard to distinguish true memories from false ones. Now my brother dont remember such abuse and I remember he was also abused, and my grandfather was very nice with me all my life, I really doubt he could do something like this. What do you think? Yesterday a girl died and I saw that in TV but I remember she died 1 year ago, but the TV and news says she really died yesterday so what should I believe?
I had something just like that happen. When I was first hearing voices I “remembered” my dad sexually abusing me. I also thought maybe my uncle was involved. After a year of thinking this and being weird around my dad I realized it was just he voices telling me things. I have been sexually abused many times by different people but none were family. Even if you can’t convince yourself it isn’t real make peace with it. Sounds like you have great memories of your grandfather. Don’t let the voices take that away. Plus if your brother says it never happened to him that’s the first sign it’s a delusion.
You are right, because I also had memories of being a secret CIA agent or something like that, it can not be true…
Yes delusions are the worst. I once believed that I heard God and I had to deliver his messages to my family and husband(boyfriend at the time) I stopped delivering messages when they started thinking I was nuts. (This was before diagnosis and meds.) If you don’t mind me asking do you take your meds?
I thought the same thing about my grandfather when I was sick…no abuse…just a false memory…don’t believe it.
Yes I take my meds, but I cant stop remembering false memories, the good thing is that I dont believe anymore in my delusions
Try raising your dose. And that’s such an important step. To know that they are just delusions. It’s a hard one but so worth it when you achieve it. Good for you.
I vividly remember murdering someone when I first started being psychotic around 16/17. My therapist helped me sort out that it was a false memory/delusion, but because of who I remembered murdering I actually enjoy the memory and haven’t worked to get rid of it or whatever. I enjoy believing it really happened.
I had false memories when I first became psychotic too. I was very influential in what I would experience, it could be a crime show I watched and id remember something that happened in it, my therapist while I was in hospital was convinced something major happened to me when I was 6 so I remembered being kidnapped and taken to the local woods, but that didn’t happen and I know it didn’t now. I have conscious memories of abuse, they are very different to what I remember with false memories, I remember all my sensory information in real memories and my false ones have a sort of hazy confused quality for me because they didnt happen and it’s my mind playing tricks on me. I can now differentiate them, I hope you Can do the same in time, and have some peace,
You could probably use professional therapy on this…
I think they just help you learn how to fact out what’s real and what’s not… instead of focusing on what feels real and what doesn’t.
On that note… I sort of did… it was more like an obsessive exaggeration and a guilt complex over things that actually proved trivial and common.
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