Trauma group update

I’ve been to four sessions so far, and I’m having mixed results. On the one hand, my nightmares aren’t so bad. Last night, I defeated the bad guy super quickly, and just spent the rest of the time surfing in the sky on a magic airboard with friends. I never used to be able to fight back in my dreams.

I’m still having trouble letting Mr. Star touch me. I was hoping to have made more progress on that, but I’m only 1/3 of the way through the program. So I can’t expect miracles, I guess. All the girls who have been there a while say they’re doing much better, and I’m jealous of them. I want to be able to brag, too. But group therapy is not a competitive sport.

An unpleasant side effect. My tremors have come back. I used to violently shiver and shake whenever I got emotional about something, whether it was good or bad. It went away when I started Geodon, but now it’s back. I find it quite challenging. It happens most when I’m teleconferencing for my internship, and it makes me super self-conscious. My voice gets all shaky too, and I have trouble getting the words out. It makes it very hard to look and sound professional. Does anyone have advice on how to stop shaking? I never learned an appropriate coping skill for this one. It just went away on its own one day.

Overall, I’m really liking group so far. I feel like I’m learning a ton, and I see the people further along in the program talking about how much they’ve improved. It gives me hope. If everything goes well, I will sign up for the advanced trauma group after I graduate from this one.

4 Likes

@ninjastar

  1. You want to breathe through your diaphragm. That takes practice because most people breathe through their chest.
  2. A little bit of anxiety is normal and helpful, so when you feel the anxiety coming on remember that and don’t fight it. If you fight it you’re going to create anticipatory anxiety.
  3. Focus on the material and ask for feedback. That will make it a conversation and take the focus off of you.

I have to run some errands, but I hope these suggestions help.

1 Like

I googled your shaking symptoms. Is what you’re suffering from called “essential temors” ?

https://www.webmd.com/brain/essential-tremor-basics

If so L-theanine might help as it says benzos help.

Medications: Oral drugs can significantly reduce the severity of essential tremor. Medications include Inderal, Mysoline, Neurontin,and Topamax Other drug options include the tranquilizers Ativan, Klonopin, Valium, and Xanax. Botox injections may also be a treatment option. This treatment has been effective for vocal and head tremors.

As a bonus L-theanine might help with your sleep quality too.

Thanks. I’ll ask my neurologist about this. I think it’s just he PTSD, but he would know better than me. It does say on that article that gabapentin can help. I already have a prescription for that, so I’ll see if it helps.

L theanine gave me terrible insomnia, so I had to stop taking it. It’s weird how sometimes a drug/supplement will have the exact opposite effect on you, huh?

And yeah, @kindness, you’re totally right. Trying to fight it only makes it worse. My mom reminded me of some tricks I used to use when I was dealing with it before. Apparently I would tap my fingers together in a pattern to distract myself, and it would make me calm down. So I’ll try that, too.

2 Likes

I find group therapy to be really helpful too. Initially I was scared to try it and felt self-conscious but I think it’s wonderful to be able to learn from others with similar experiences and also get many different points of view on your own thoughts and feelings. I’m glad you’re having such a good experience!!

The thing about the dreams is very interesting. I have been a lucid dreamer since I was 8 and could control everything, got really strong over the years, many powers. Then after I had my trauma and developed ptsd, suddenly I lost my lucidity. No powers in dreams, helpless, terrible nightmares, etc. It took years to be able to be lucid again and it’s not with the same frequency or extent as it was before still. Last night I had a nightmare & the “bad guy” in mine I was helpless against however my friends stepped in to protect me and I thought that was really nice. (In the past it was always up to me, no one could or would help, etc) It’s so cool how our dreams reflect our innermost feelings.

As for the tremors I’m not sure, sorry :disappointed: I get a less intense version of that to where it’s not noticeable to other people but it is noticeable for me. Maybe if you have benzos try taking one before anything professional? Unless it makes you sleepy I dunno.

1 Like