Today is just a cluster Fvck

Had to take double my Haldol. I have been experimenting with my medication and took Wellbutrin and celexa this morning. Drank an energy drink on way to work out. Did my cardio.
Got to work and full on voices, agitation, the works. Thank god I had my trusty klonopin, then popped an extra Haldol.

Tired of these med experiments, but also don’t like how I feel. It’s rough for a brother.
I’m calmed down now, but I don’t like feeling zombied out either!!!
:crying_cat_face:
BE POSITIVE…!!! I want to scream my head off at least once, most days.

1 Like

idk if the energy drink is a good idea, sometimes these things can give you a rush and make your thinking faster, your energy levels spike and if you are not doing anything the energy goes to the head i guess, i try to avoid things like that,

2 Likes

I had around 300-400 Monster drinks from ages 12-13. Could have been the cause of my break, but I highly doubt it…

i was just going by my own experiences anyway, yours might be different as we all are different,

i heard that these monster drinks or high energy drinks may cause adhd though, idk if that is true but i can see how all of that sugar energy could cause increased energy levels

I think it was a combo of that and the IR Wellbutrin just kicked in. Made me feel frantic.

1 Like

I sometimes feel energy drinks are anxiety in a can. I do drink them occasionally but they can really set me off.

I too sometimes take an extra pill if things get bad. My psychiatrist knew I did this and he was fine with it (well within reason).

I found klonopin to be a great med for sz stuff. Unfortunately my new doc doesn’t like prescribing them.

I have ADHD so that might be right

1 Like

I would start crying at my psych. apt if they didn’t give me some sort of benzo.
I think it helps with Haldol side effects and mentally slows me down.

I seriously start loosing my ■■■■ and get chest pains. They try and give me other options like buspar, but I need my kpins.

Are your symptoms actually clustered, or are they multiplexed ?

I don’t know what that means

By multiplexed it means that many things are happening, but at only one at a time.

Often the mind sees this condition as a cluster of simultaneous events.

Just recently I was watching the popular “Russian Car Crash Compilations” on YouTube, and when doing so you notice that car tail lights are blinking on and off, as are each of the intersection stop-yield-go lights when each is individually active. To the human eye, it appears as thought each of these lights are on continuously even though they are not. They are flashing on and off fast enough such that the human can not notice that this is the case. In turn, power is saved.

Now if the victim of schizophrenia can see negative events individually, maybe the overwhelming effect can be reduced as well, rather than it be seen as one huge negative event.

All I know is everything was happening at once.

Are you being facetious? (Just wondered. Subtlety is hard to detect here.) :smile:

I’d say I was half serious. I’m assuming that could not have possibly been the case… thank the illness for thinking that.

I’m still wobble-eyed (I wish they had an emoticon for that like they do on Yahoo, but they don’t), but I think I’m getting the picture.

I will say this, though. That much caffeine and taurine might be enough to take one who had the genetics, but hadn’t been stressed enough to flip them into florid expression, into… florid expression.

In my world, that would be called “low-grade excitotoxicity.” See (if you can stand it; if you don’t think so, bail out right now)…