To feel very limited in your brain, what is this?

So when I was on my Zyprexa only plus my illness, I went so limited in my head that I remained for years in the dark. I am not sure what is this. the illness, the negatives or the meds? somebody here who was like this? I was overloaded by the surrounding information so I ended up by skipping it. I don’t look at the buildings outside, neither the sky or the sun… I am anxious too so I look at my feet. Idk if ill have my chances with all this.

when im outside i feel like im not taking in everything that is around me … is that what u feel?

Did you ever get a CT scan or MRI of your head? It might reveal something curable.

I’m getting a contrast CT scan of my head, my hopes are riding on it revealing the cause of my constant pain and SZ symptoms.

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I think cris that I even don’t see the things around me anymore… One of the reasons of this is my anxiety, but there is also the inability to process all the information around me. I am just too dumb, maybe its the meds too…

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I had that Anna.

I have it since I’ve started long term treatment with Olanzapine (Zyprexa).
Was clear, focused and sharp before that.

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I get that too. I have a hard time processing information so I can only handle a few bits at a time. I too feel like my mind is limited. I often say that it feels like half my brain is missing or has gone dark. It’s challenging to describe exactly what it feels like, but it’s frustrating and scary.

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@anon1517417, can you say that you have some blockages to think and talk too like me? Its definitely some dark place. I guess its the result from some combo of my anxious and depressed mind. I know that its in depression that you cant think well… The anxiety could be an obstacle too and the delusions too…

It can be hard, especially if you feel like your senses are overloaded and you get overwhelmed.
When I get overwhelmed and don’t know what to do, I often end up doing nothing.

Maybe you can practice? Try to look at buildings when you walk in the streets, maybe start with only doing it for a short time, and focusing on things like how the window-frames look, or what colour the walls are.

I don’t think you’re dumb at all. I think you’ve gotten so used to not talking and only looking down, that it’s hard for you to reverse it. I believe you can with some training, but it might take a long time.
It’s natural to get frustrated by one’s limitations, but it’s okay to take things at your own pace.
Just don’t give up, and keep trying. You’ll get there :slight_smile:

I was so sedated on olanzapine all I could do was retreat I recognise this feeling completely. I stil do now and I’m on Chlorpromazine every drug I get it, but it was worse on olanzapine so it’s probably a combination of illness and drug. I have been avoiding everything since a recent suicide attempt during a revealing flashback. I have an essay to write for next friday, I’ve been told to do one thing at a time by my mum, I think my tasks may need to be smaller. I can’t admit to anyone how dark I feel, I have to be positive, I have to carry on but when I’m outside I panic again I look at the floor and have headphones on so I don’t have to see people or anything Ive done that for years I tried to change it but I couldn’t. It keeps me outside. While my mum is at work I go back to bed and set an alarm say half an hour before she leaves work so I can show I’ve been okay. But i wake up and I’m anxious. It’s easier in my bedroom with the curtains closed, I’ll put some soothing music on just lie there. I feel very limited just the way you describe you’ve described it well. You’re not alone

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Dante and Berru, I also believe that Zyprexa is causing this state in a way too… I was quite reasonable before the meds, I never had hallucinations or mania, so the aps put me quite down. I need an ap I guess, but there are too many bad side effects on the other hand too. Maybe I need some other med to calm down my fears too in order to start to look at the world again. Ill try to figure with my doc if I have panics and anxiety along with the paranoia, I start to believe it that I do and that this wasn’t treated till now…

Yes, thinking and talking is hard. Having a conversation is hard. It might have to do with an impaired working memory, which I have. You can’t hold information in your head long enough to manipulate it in order to have a complex thought let alone express it in speech. Aside from ruminating, which can also be the result of an impaired working memory, it is by far my most distressing symptom…

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I’ve been on Olanzapine/Zyprexa for about 3 years. At times it snowed me into sedation, now I hardly realize I am taking it and I’m on a pretty high dose too. One of my biggest problems now is waking up in the morning. I am told I must stay on the medication for preventing relapses of sz. I have been hospitalized now twice while on Olanzapine, so I am not so sure it is effective.
A while ago under supervision my dose was greatly reduced and I felt so liberated–really quite good. But I started to have symptoms and had to go back up in dosage.
I am functioning well now. My doctor has told me he intends to lower my meds over time.

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