Ive tried a lot of things. Exercise, even just 20-30 mins a day (everyday for 2-3 months now), kratom (8 different strains specifically for depression and adhd), various prescribed amphetamines at various dosages, prescribed benzos, 7-9 different antidepressants over 4 years time, dxm for depression, etc…
Im so caught up in my own little world that everything/everybody is so terrifying. I cant be truly open with anyone, I trust none. Even if i did, where to begin. I dont know how to talk to my nurse or pdoc about this stuff and my OT was trying to ‘help’ but honestly they were just mocking me/pointing fun.
I dont mean to be all ‘woah is me’ but Im really fking pissed at this illness. I feel like there may be something else wrong, but ive done blood work and everything is fine apparently.
Even just last year I had my own business, it was small, but it gave me so much purpose. Now I pace and think dumb sht all day. Cant even get the energy up to watch tv ffs.
You can get back to having your own business in the future. If it’s not right now, just work your way through your issues one step at a time and try and reach that goal.
I have been in the same position as you, and now I work and live independently. It can be done, just takes time to heal and find the right therapy and medication.
That’s no problem. Just getting to a functional level can be a huge achievement, and normies never will understand how hard we fight to get up to fight this battle.
Just remember when you’re back on your feet to think about where you have come from, and what you have achieved. That’s what keeps me going.
Yep the forum is pretty good. I vent sometimes too, and it’s a release.
One thing that helped me is accepting that not everyone is bad. Sometimes it feels that way, but there are some good people out there. There are of course a lot of not good people also, but it’s easy to give up hope and feel like everything is against you even when that’s not the case. Keep hope alive!