Just heard the name of an ex of mine, woken some old memories. So it’s story time while I process.
So I’m somewhere lost in New York, she lived at the barracks for a while, when the cult was still together. Like all the other outcasts she found a place she thought she belonged.
Been selling her body since she was a teen. Escaped Russia, orphaned, on drugs like the rest of us. Really troubled soul.
She knew a lot, was street smart genius, and was beautiful. Two troubled souls can sometimes attach very quickly, only to burn out fast and bright.
Kissed a few times, New Years was our first. Never slept together, she would of been happy if she never had sex again.
In my drug addled proselytizing she was my priestess. I wanted to save her. Couldn’t save myself.
We never really broke up, we just both ran in separate directions when the feds shut us down.
I’ve been stumbling down memory lane a bit as well, recently. Trying to explain to the kids how sometimes, you’re an amazing person, and they are an amazing person, but together you both end up being super toxic. Reminds me of an old flame from my youth. We were madly in love, and every time we tried to show it we kept hurting each other.
She probably does. I still speak fondly of the guy I met in a pub in London, who took me back to his place and within 1 minute of kissing could tell I wasn’t into it and pulled back and said “if you would rather, we can just watch Firefly.” And we spent the night watching firefly and talking about philosophy. In the morning he made breakfast and paid for a cab back to my hostel. I will never forget him, because I found it so strange and unique at the time that he wouldn’t want to hook up with someone who wasn’t into it. Now I know that’s normal, and I just had some very bad luck previously.
I kind of wish I could like, leave a review for him or something. “Fully decent guy who respects everyone and is probably marriage material for anyone who is attracted to men. Definitely date him.”
Yeah, there are so many brief meetings I have had with folks, both platonic and romantic, that I will probably never see again but who were so important to me.
I mean, stastically, given the crowds we both ran with and the amount of travelling we have done, we very well may have been at the same party at some point.