I have met many people who are fearful to leave their homes or go out into social situations. I feel like i have the opposite problem for some weird reason i feel safest and the most free when im outside. I feel trapped when im stuck at home almost like im suffocating in it sometimes. Especially if im home by myself. Also most people are skeptical of strangers and new people and for me its the opposite. I feel like with someone i dont know their are no expectations nothing i need to live up to. That it doesnt matter what they think or judge me on since i will never see them again anyways. And thats if i even notice them. I tend to walk down the street and even though im looking around i dont nessessarilly see things. Or rememver anything i see. Its like in in my own world and everything else is just background noise. Yet i get extremely paranoid about anyone i actually know and should trust. I always think their is some underlying meaning to their thoughts and actions. Which could actually be accurate since i am strangely perceptive when it comes to people. But i cant always tell what is an accurate perception and what is my paranoid feelings. Its also that o dont fear the same things as most of the people i know. Most people fear death and loneliness. Yet i dont fear death because i already know that some experiences are worse. To me death is like the peace that comes after the battle. Sometimes i even look forwarf to it. And loneliness i know that i am perfectly capable of meeting people and connecting so this doesnt scare me like it scares some. I just feel different sometimes. I feel like people in my life cant even omagine how i see the world so they never understand why i do the thjngs i do or why i react to the things that i do. Does anyone else have parts of themselves that they feel is so differwnt that no one really gets it?
I was a full-on agoraphobic for at least two months at one point… now I get restless when I’m stuck inside. I can’t say I don’t have social anxiety because I do, but I’m not afraid to go out anymore.
I also like strangers @Serene , I like to joke around with them or hold a door open, whatever the situation presents.
I think we all have gifts and you’ll find a lot of people that will appreciate yours, and your unique thoughts.
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