Waking up in the morning with a clear head. And feeling like my old self AND my new self. Being able to see clearly the problems I have. Seeing the solution and feeling like I am somewhat on the right path. Realizing for the umpteenth time that I.m not always wrong or I’m not causing trouble. It’s just that every day is a new day, a new beginning. Feeling my oats even at age 56. But the weather is nice today here in California.
Anyways, I slept in and my step-dad is going to pick me up in an hour to visit my moms grave. I think of her often but it’s been at least a month that I just haven’t sat and think exclusively of her instead of abstract moments in our lives. I remember some of her bad qualities but those are of little importance. I think more of her being kind to strangers.
I remember the times we would be in line at the supermarket or some other store and there would be some teenage girl in front of us and my mom would just say something like, “That’s a nice blouse you got on” and the girl would smile at the compliment and the attention and then then my mom and her would have a little, friendly conversation and the girl would smile and walk of feeling special. My mom had a knack for that that I admired in her.
Anyways, I am going to visit her with my step-dad and then it’s lunch with my sister, my step-dad and me. After that, I don’t know what I will do. Probably vacuum the carpets, lol.