(No, not this ==> @Hedgehog)
We’ve got this new co-worker. Nice enough lady, but she is VERY Christian and likes to remind everyone else in the office of it. So she kind of made my brain stall and reboot at work today:
Broker with good hair: Oh, ____ was pranking us on the phone today because he was bored at _____ branch. He phoned in pretending he was Ron Jeremy and [girl answering phone] didn’t catch it.
Team leader: Should I know who this is?
Ultra-Christian chick: He’s my FAVOURITE porn star! We were at this strip club one time and he was there and he autographed my boob!
Me: Uuuuuuuuuuh, I have to go pick up my daughter from work. Nite!
And now you know how SZs can pass as normal in the workplace. A good chunk of normies are bat ■■■■ crazier than us and make good decoys.
Aha hahahaha I feel like this chick is me from ten years ago!!!
Everyone was just bug-eyed and silent for about 10 seconds and then we all fled.
I would have asked her which boob, right or left and then trick her into showing me exactly where he signed.
Great story! I laughed and then felt what I usually feel, disgust for people in general…
I feel badly for her. I know she really wants this job, but… When you’re hired you have three months and three attempts to learn the content for and pass the Level 1 Insurance Broker exam here in the province we live in. She’s been there for two weeks and she’s still not getting the most basic concepts. She was in my office again today asking me to explain indemnity. That’s the first concept on the first page of a 750 page set of binders. She’s not past page one yet!!!
I hope she finds a job she’s better suited for. I don’t want to sound arrogant, but I’m a fairly intelligent person. However, I have distinct limitations and have found my niche accordingly. It’s hard to “step down” and take a job that’s less demanding, but it necessary sometimes. I hope she comes to the same conclusion…for everyone’s sake.