Schizophrenia.com

The Geek Corner (talk about STEM or other nerdy stuff here)

@johnnyboy1, everyone on this forum has a story and a history. Feel free to share what you are comfortable with. We stick by each other…

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Must have been real hard to do that. In my younger days, I used to have a stone face. I took lots of pain to present a soft look. It took a tremendous amount of effort, let me tell you.

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@Loke I am an engineer myself. I get what you mean.

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I was pretty in high school but I didn’t fit in cos I didn’t have the right clothes and I was a nerd I guess. I didn’t play sports. I wasn’t a cheerleader.

I could dance back then though. I was friends with a guy that didn’t fit in either and we used to dance together in the band room at my high school. They made fun of him for being gay. It was in the 90s in rural West Virginia.

@Big-Toe. What branch of engineering are you in? Just curious

I was interested in a lot of things. I wanted to work in economics, business, and especially finance. I just had my whole life ruined and turned outside down a billion times over. I went from having a normal life with huge potential to being a low to moderate schizophrenic with no life or potential at all. Even my loser cousin can do more than me and has more potential. She doesn’t even have a HS diploma and has a very low IQ and acts childish and has more potential than I do. She has had jobs and stuff while the most I ever did in the past 10 years was volunteer at a library for a couple of months max. My paranoia ruined it. My dad is extremely hard on me and mean sometimes. He was always emotionally abusive but it just gets worse when one has schizophrenia. It just makes me relapse. He gets tired of me talking. I think he lacks empathy and some compassion.

My math skills and intelligence are limited but I did like the concept of investment banking, hedge fund work, and private equity type stuff. I even thought about being a quant but knew it was way, way too hard for me. They have masters in Financial engineering but I just never had the skills. I was majoring in math in this life when I dropped out because of “insanity” from a bad trip but I question the narrative and situation constantly. I think something far, far worse happened like Montauk Boys Program…The sad thing is I’m stuck reliving my life over and over again. People just assume I’m crazy.

I got a lot of Cs in college so that pretty much ruled out any grad school. Every decent grad school requires at least a 3.0 in your major. Mine is like 2.0ish or something. My overall GPA after I transferred was 2.7-2.9ish. I cannot remember. Before that at community college it was 3.89-3.9.

Growing up I wanted to be a fighter pilor or robotic engineer. My step-father was a highly successful business owner and automation and control engineer among other things. He’s really a jack of all trades now. We are poor because of his financial decisions and life choices, but he did make good money growing up for a while…

I sort of wanted to work for the government, but my blabber mouth and mental illness ruined all that. I know I will never work for the government and get a clearance even a basic one, which just makes me want to puke sometimes.

I tried applying for a basic computer operator job at a local place but my life was ruined/destroyed. I might have been targeted since university for unknown, unethical, and inhumane reasons. I never figured it out. I could have posted something stupid or was high walking around town and “taken”. I have weird horrible thoughts about being brainwashed now, but I think they are damn lies or delusions or something.

A computer operator job is something that is a dying career, but it paid decent money, was local, and had benefits. I was an honest good person. I know it will never happen.

I think the government constantly has experimented on me including my brain for unknown reasons sort of like extreme MK-Ultra against my knowledge, consent, and awareness. I have memories.

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Listen up up the standard is to listen to music of today ass well…I think you remind me a lot about Sheldon from Big Bang theory…do you have his number

If I could guess your thoughts from a few numbers would you be impressed

wdym by sheldon?

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That doesn’t make sense

I really want to get back into programming. I wanted to learn to code bots and AI, and eventually, I want to create an AI that mimics human consciousness.

I think it would be revolutionary in understanding mental illnesses because we could feed it data on medication and recovery and what brain chemistry naturally is like/what it does, which would enable tinkering with the AI’s “neurotransmitters” to simulate what would happen with certain imbalances–possibly finding sources and even more well-targeted interventions for those with MIs!

It’s exciting in my head at least.

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I’m a big science fan. My favorites are archaeology, palentology, and plants.

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I’m not trying to be rude but I have no idea what you’re talking about.

I am an electrical engineer. Completed my course then came down with the sickness. Couldn’t exactly get myself into a career or a good job. Currently I an a freelance content writer…

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Don’t stress over it. He is either very sick or trolling.

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yeah i wanted to be a lot of things before i had my depression.life treats us badly sometimes.

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