The downside of sz - feel so useless!

Just feel so useless. Want to get into my art and writing again but so f***ing unmotivated! !! I feel so … useless! Want to earn money and share with others but such a damn failure in life.
How do I even begin to motivate myself??? Or is sz going to suck me dry forever?
I swear the most crippling thing about sz is the lack of drive. …

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I agree. Avolition has pretty much neutralised me as a person.

Maybe min-101 will make it to market and save future generations from this.

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This is how I feel but it’s less about avolition and more about a feeling of hopelessness. But I really have accomplished very little if anything in life.

It’s like that line from “It’s my life”-" I ask myself, “what good do you do” except the rest of the song doesn’t apply to me as I haven’t even been in one relationship.

I had a pain of noonr talking to me. I felt as a castout. I just wanted someone to exchange thoughts with me. So as a solution i started so called bookconversation. I cant tell the book my thoughts. But the person behind that book is tellim me his thoughts with passion in his heart totally. And i had company.

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Yes. Avolition has me staying at home, unable to act. I get out and about, but it is all so pointless. I served dinner to my stepfather yesterday. That was something, but already I am feeling as if I will have to abandon that approach. I just want to sit in one place without doing anything, without thinking.

Schizophrenia has annihilated my creativity. Even with CBT, my avolition has gotten much better but my creativity still lacks tremendously.