Your so sweet Aliali! Thank you for your kindness.
Sooo Sorry that happens to you Zengarden! It happens to me too when issues arise that I I shut the door on, locked it tight and threw away the key. If I can keep it locked up it cant rear its ugly head and hurt me again. What cooping tools do you use to calm yourself down?
As a small child I would hold my breath till I passed out. So I have to break the method of coping with uncomfortable areas. My parents were 42 when they had me in 63. I had much older brothers and my mom would listen to the news and get hysterical when numbers came up and then sob, I remember all of that. I remember her talking about sending us away and hiding the kids. Now I understand the numbers were SS numbers and my mom would be frightened sick if numbers were close to my 2 eligible brothers to be drafted for the Vietnam war. ( dont mean to insult anyone’s intelligence, I just thought I should clarify because this is an international site and others may have no clue what I am talking about.) There were many friends of hers who’s sons were. Both brothers were born in Canada so they held dual citizenship and my parents could have sent them back to my cousins, but as a small child I of course thought I was to be sent away if I was not good vs the situation not being good and my brothers sent for protection of a war that was so horrible for our military veterans.I could not stand for her to be upset. As an adult I also realize that when we are very stressed the least little thing can heighten it and I imagine a small child passing out on her sent her over the edge.
That’s why I am asking, Andy. Thanks for confirming my concern. I see him early next month. I may call the office earlier. Could it be that the pharmacy made a mistake? My sister in law looked at it and she is an RN and commentated on how high it was so I know I am reading it right. So sorry that voice wont go away. I know you would love to send it back to the Jeanie bottle and cap it shut and sink it at the bottom of the ocean.
It must be horrible worrying every day about your brothers being drafted. That would be awful. My son wants to join the army, but he isn’t old enough. I am hoping they won’t take him because he has autism. I will do everything I can to stop him. He is my only child.
For coping mechanism I find if i play music with lots of notes in it it helps stop me from thinking. Every time a note plays it gets my attention and I have to listen. It is helpful when your thoughts are causing the problem it will block them out. Also working with my hands on things like crochet are helpful too. It helps distract me. If I am doing really bad surfing the internet on my phone on facebook really helps. When I was doing really bad I brought my calming music with me in an ipod in case of an emergency I could find a seat or even hide in the washroom or my car if I was having a bad attack. Walking around helps for some reason too. I figured that out by accident and it really helped.
Don’t worry Zengarden they will not take your son. Mine has epilepsy and they will not take him either. They have to be able to react quickly and logically w their team. And they cant be on mind altering drugs of any kind. My little tornado or Tasmanian devil as I like to refer to him when his ritilin wears off, LOL has not been labeled Autistic by his Neuro, but he is high functioning. He is affectionate with me and his brother but cant walk the halls at school there are too many people near him. ( school of 1750) Sooo my solution with him is he has to be in ROTC, I had to fight to get him in, because he cant be accepted to the military when he graduates. But he is so much happier, there is a lot of structure and that works wonderfully with his special needs. He does not have to worry if someone is not or will not do something because he knows the Col will make sure they do and that is very comforting to him. I would like for him to also be in the Civil Air Patrol if I could just get him there, its in a very busy part of town and right now its off my grid. I have told him that he can learn all he needs to know for latter by being in ROTC, he learns discipline, respect, proper grooming, leadership skills, and to work as a team player. ( which is hard for any Autistic child.) I also told him he can work as a civilian on a base. He likes that idea. He would love to work on a Coast Guard base, he is obsessed with the boats and planes and rescue. He thinks its the power rangers. I think we both share so much. I know my greatest stresser or worry is my childs happiness. Now that he is in HS I had to face the fact that he will never be able to get a licence, I have not told him that, I just cant. I cant tell him he has to be off his meds for 5 years if he got married to have a child or the meds would cause severe damage to a fetus. I cant tell him they do not believe he will make it past his mid 20’s if a seizure does not take him then organ failure will from a seizure. I cant bare the reality of taking those rights of passage from him. I want him to dream and feel he is connected to the world and it will love who he is. I know you feel the same. I have my trains on now, and the wind chimes, very soothing to me. I play a Celtic woman tape in the car to soothe me and I have certain play lists on my phone that I can turn on to help me breathe through it and leave my hair alone before I comb it so hard with my hands it will be in knots or come out. I paint! I am happiest and calmest when I can paint or craft of some type. In fact if I have left the house for any length of time I have to come home and paint or craft. I just checked my Facebook page I usually post a picture of what I have done when it is finished but they are not in a folder. I will have to find them/ I’m being told we have to go to bed. We have to count the banister posts and the number of steps to make sure they are still correct! Nightly ritual. Talk to you soon!!!
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