Sz and the story of sisyphus I wanted to share

I hate the idea that I’m in a situation where there’s no hope. The story of Sisyphus, to me, changes that. Here’s my abridged interpretation. If you took any philosophy class, you already know it.

Sisyphus was cursed by the gods to forever roll a heavy rock up a mountain. The rock, being heavy, would roll back down. He would have to return to the rock and roll it back up, which would again roll down. Each win is followed by defeat and the gods would relish it. But Sisyphus decided small a change is needed. Every time the rock rolls down, he rolls it back up and adds a gesture of scorn to the gods that punished him. Every loss that occurs will be followed by a win, and the gods that were once delighted to watch him suffer now have to endure his insolence. Forever. He redefined his punishment.

This has helped with my intrusive thought spam. These thoughts, that to me are like mean people, come and sit in the foreground of my attention, but I’ve learned to let them be there and live my life in spite of them. But this makes them get weaker, then sometimes absent, then they stop coming. New intrusive thoughts can come, but by “rolling the rock” and doing my business those, too, will stop attending.

Att I was getting ready for a life of spiting thought spam. But the story became a way to cope.

Just wanted to share a story that inspired me. Thanks for reading.

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Something that may also help Sz’s is the “Scarlet Letter”. I never read it but apparently the “A” she wears gets redefined from “Adulterer” to “Able”.

Shame is a topic of mine. I’ve been open about feeling/marinating like I was a sexual harasser. I talked for too long and was coming off a long night, it was terrible optics. We were angrily interrupted by a manager. Ultimately there weren’t too many winners. My career was interrupted, but what I’m “aching” to say is that in this “group” at the time I sort of colored this manager as “The Serpent” from the bible.

You definitely take yourself with you… I know. But this community/organization of people, seemingly accepts flaws with me. I try not to be Needy and reality check all the time, but I am mentally ill.

I never new sisyphos had an upbeat ending though. Thanks for sharing.

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