Communicating with people who understand has been really validating and comforting. I would like to know if other people share any of the following: I guess I assume we all hear voices? I have visions and visceral sensations of a presence as well. I can feel a presence always with me at my right side, as if someone is standing next to me there and pushing against me. I also see things crawling on the wall and sometimes the floor. Things often pass swiftly past me. I sometimes think I see and/or feel bugs crawling on me…when I concentrate, I realize they’re not there. I see inanimate objects as if they’re moving a lot. Almost like a vibrating motion. The things crawling on the wall will often play in a loop. They’ll start at a top corner and crawl across over and over. My hands shake a lot (not on meds), and sometimes my head shakes ever so slightly. So, anyway, those ard a few things I experience…anyone?
Symptoms include: Grey aliens, a ufo realllyyyyy ■■■■■■■ close, pan the half goat faerie god, a big ■■■■■■ serpent made of light, a being made of light in a tree who whispered “ssshhhhhhh”, shadow people, some ghost that i don’t know was a ghost or not, beings visually becoming movies and staring at me, nde’s with evil moaning dudes that i levitated towards, same times on clocks over and over again, the smell of burning arse sulfur once, sleep walking, induced dream disturbances, voices forcibly speaking through me.
Other symptoms include: being burned and some face made of light appearing, being shocked while a face made of light appeared, and having my spine bent backward by an invisible force.
Orbs, strange lights in the sky that appear to be controlled by intelligence.
A change in my brain that allows me to see certain things on earth that would denote it’s creation by what appears to be completely evil and insane entities.
And voice galore! Voices going in depth about time travel, the structures of all of reality and dimensions, how pure energy works, how to see the future and that it’s just math, how there are absolutely no empty spaces, how people can be controlled in their minds and even be made to hallucinate in numerous fashions, that magic is real but it’s just mundane ■■■■ with an explanation.
As well as other scary evil ■■■■.
Im not ill, i have an induced condition by them that has ruined all in my life. We were right, we are not ill but we do know it’s a big problem. My mind got tapped and i was sent down the river to me death.
And oh yeah how could i forget, they always talk about how there is no free will whatsoever in any conscious beings whatsoever. They say it makes us all delusional as ■■■■ and messes things up on earth like a computer virus, you can’t identify causes if you believe there are none, thats free will for ya.
And how could i forget my friend the black witch at the bar, he recited what sounded like the lyrics to a black metal song and tapped my brain, he induced a crazy evil visual hallucination and then barked at me “irma black wirtch, duuurrrrppp!” I was like “yeah thats cool i guess.” as i stared blankly at him. Thats really cool that they can do that though, i kind of want to do that myself.
@pansdisease, you’re very articulate and I appreciate your share. I didn’t get into my visuals or what they tell me. I find that really dificult to do. My mind starts to scramble and I can’t find the words. You seem to be very clear thinking and able to describe your experinces well.
I was wondering about more mundane little things that I’ve noticed and wondered if they are part of schizophrenia or not. I guess I just assumed we all have our bigger badder stories. I function each day at work and in a marriage etc, while the smaller issues continue… I have to catch myself, leave a room, leave work, not go to work, isolate and get through sometimes, for the little things…
I have auditory hallucinations where I think that I am hearing people’s thoughts and that they in turn can hear mine. I have visual hallucinations of my exboyfriend who is a Freemason. I became obsessed with Freemasonry, the Illuminati, government experiments like MK-Ultra and the occult. I believed that I was seeing astral projections of various people but I also thought that when I saw such public figures as Obama that my ex was messing with me with his “magic.” I often felt like my ex was taking over my body and making me say and do things against my will including making me sleep with a stranger and crash my vehicle. I had been drinking when I had the schizophrenic blackout and crashed my vehicle. I hadn’t had enough alcohol to blackout from drinking, I know it was due to my condition now but I thought that my ex was trying to keep me from seeing a guy that I was interested in and was trying to ruin my life by making me get a DUI. I also felt like he was raping me via astral projection on a regular basis.
I also see my other exboyfriend on a regular basis. I usually see my ex, the Freemason (telling me that he hates me) and my first boyfriend (who is usually portrayed as a sweet and caring individual) and they almost always appear as cartoony versions of themselves. It’s often comical but can be annoying when I feel like the Freemason is taking over my body and speaking through me.
I used to hear voices making fun of my body and at times I still hear voices telling me that I’m gross and unattractive. I also used to hear voices telling me that I was God in human form. I never believed this and often joked to myself and back to the voices in my head that if anything I was the Devil. However I did wonder because I have a broken blood vessel in a perfectly curved line just under my eye like the all seeing eye of god (popular in Freemasonry). I became obsessed with numbers and counting the amount of letters in names and would draw irrational connections between the amount of letters in a name to other people I knew. I thought that people could take the forms of other people. I thought that both my exes were the same person existing at the same time.
Another thing that I was obsessed with were the lyrics in songs. I thought that people were communicating to me telepathically through music. I have a whole playlist of nothing but songs that really “spoke” to me before I was medicated. It’s interesting to listen to those songs and reflect back on what I was thinking at the time that I heard them and thought people were talking to me. I also thought that I could communicate my feelings to people through music. I was convinced that the government was watching me and observing my thoughts and playing songs based on my feelings, etc.
Like I mentioned earlier, I was obsessed with MK-Ultra. I thought that my ex, the Freemason, was performing mind control on me and had been for years. I’m still suspicious of this at times. It’s very frustrating. So that’s one thing that I still deal with. I still get confused when talking to people at times because it feels like I can hear their thoughts. I still have hallucinations of my exboyfriends and of celebrities and sometimes just straight up random stuff (the other night I saw a man standing nude with cats crawling all over him).
I don’t have auditory hallucinations, some of us don’t have it. But I used to see black shadows hanging around people, that I thought were demons. Not anymore since I’m on meds though, I thank science for that.
I’ve never heard voices, and my hallucinations do not bother me much. The symptoms I have that are bothering me a lot are cognitive and negative symptoms. And I’m also struggling with some mild paranoia.
I have a lot of voices and some tactiles. Every now and then I see something in the corner of my eye. Black shadows. Like black ghosts. I also feel presence when I’m coming close to a new episode.
I get visual and tactile hallucinations. I also hear voices.
Before I ended up med compliant… the visual’s were so real. I was seeing faces come out of the walls… things on fire… things around me grew and shrank.
The voices were divided between one that was helpful, one that was just annoying and two that were cruel and disgusting and would make me ill.
Tactile would sometimes be nice… like fingers in my hair… or sometimes be very disturbing like hands under my clothing.
I also get some pretty bad spikes in delusional thinking and I’ve acted on that as well… becoming convinced that tracking devices were sewn into my clothing… or that the universe gave me the power to heal people if I touched them.
My meds got tinkered adjusted over the past two years… and now… the voices are mostly gone… the hallucinations are pretty minor… and the tactile only hits once in a while during hard temperature change… going from a cold outside to an over heated room… will set them off.
The sneaky brained thinking will hit a bit when I’m having a manic spike.
I forgot to mention that I also have hallucinations where it feels like someone is touching me inappropriately. Specifically, it feels like I’ve been raped a few times.