Stuff I learned dating

I think it’s nice if a woman is attractive, but no one is making love all day long 7 days a week. I’ve dated beautiful women. The thing about beautiful women is when you’re at work you’re fantasizing about what you want to do to them. Life happens. You gotta lot to do. Both of you are tired and things become lack luster. Eventually reality hits and you know those fantasies are just delusions. So you look elsewhere for what you’re not getting. That’s why I think it’s important to be self aware and analyze your thinking and act early. If someone is attractive and rich people are more likely to be nice to them rather than a poor person. So, people act this way in this type of relationship.I think that even if 2 people don’t have a lot in common in a relationship it can survive a long time if there’s peace. If everyday there are no troubles, even if a person is unhappy, they won’t feel the urge to fight or flight. Comfort kills most people. I think in some relationships where there is physical attraction and peace you don’t notice if you have nothing in common or you don’t need to understand each other’s coping mechanisms because you never use them. You’re comfortable, but the problem is peace doesn’t last forever. Life is problems. Some men create this bubble of peace around women using their finances. The woman becomes comfortable, but don’t wake her

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This sums life doesn’t it

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Yeah, that’s stuff that applies to you. It’s not a general statement. I have been with women I found hot, I didn’t go around fantasizing and when I was home I had all the energy required of me and then some. I did spend weeks making love all day long 7 days a week when the circumstances were right, only ever going out to eat or buy food, I don’t see what’s so unlikely about that. It’s fun, it’s not a job. You do it, you cuddle or joke around, plan the next meal and you are back at it. That’s the life if you ask me.

A relationship works on your end based on two things. When they are not around you appreciate them and the main feeling towards them is gratitude and when they are around you appreciate your time with them because it’s time with them period, the rest is just life mixing up the circumstances but you are glad they are in your moments even while you are fighting, only ever moving away from them when you don’t like yourself and never because you don’t like them.

If you want things, events or scenarios out of a relationship you are already far gone as far as I’m concerned because you aren’t in a relationship with someone but with ideas. An idea of them, an idea of love, an idea of the relationship itself, constantly trying to construct scenarios like they are Instagram stories.

There’s a part of you that appreciates every single possible scenario with a person you love, if you’ve ever loved and lost you know for a fact that you miss the bad just as much as the good. Constantly trying to steer the scenario where you want it to go doesn’t allow you to appreciate the moment you are living then and there.

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Stuff I learned when dating is it has to feel right and you have to share the same core values. Anyway, obviously, that’s for me

why i dont read long posts, it takes commitment. :frowning:

Hey man great thread.

I believe that physical attraction (ok, peace as well) from both parts is extremely important. I believe “connecting” as in interests in common, is vastly overrated as well.

But. I realize every day more and more than beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe an “objectively” model looking woman can seem uninteresting and plain to me.
I have found girls less conventionally good looking that drove me crazy. I also have found (I remember this, she was the girlfriend of a very good friend. I decided not to try anything with her. But it was hard to pass) model looking women that also drive me crazy.

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Btw, today has become increasingly popular the term “sugar daddy”, which is related to the final part of your post. There are websites for advertising these services, at least in some countries I believe.

What I see is a transaction very simmilar to hiring an escort, but a “long term rental”.

Any opinions about this?

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loool thats quite a phrase :joy:

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I mean… it is what it is.

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lmao yea. what has this world come to when people are renting out their vagaygays to buy groceries tho :joy:

actually they say prostitution is the oldest profession

i guess the cavemen used to trade animal hides for it :man_shrugging:

thats one way to get laid

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I like women with hairy armpits.

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Okay but what if it’s your second date?
:thinking: :smirk: :sweat_smile: :rofl:

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I’m sorry that’s been your experience @Zwaynopolous . It sucks to always be looking for something better. It’s stressful and there’s a feeling behind it that one is never satisfied. That’s hard to deal with.

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In my experience money = girlfriend unless you’re attractive, then you don’t need the money.

Whenever I say this people get mad at me though and call me an incel, so I went back to just keeping my mouth shut. Not talking about something doesn’t make it false though.

Anyway I’m unattractive and poor so I’m single. I still try to find happiness alone though. I’ve also had a low sex drive since being medicated which helps me not focus on things that are impossible, and instead override my body’s wants to align with more realistic goals.

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Yeah, most guys need to have their act together to date in women’s eyes. A woman can be full of problems and a guy will take her on according to a lot of people I’ve talked to. I dated a girl she had 10 credit cards, I paid them, plus I was gonna buy her a car and pay for her college then she cheated on me. I took her on with all those problems. Have you ever heard of a woman doing that for a man in large numbers? Probably not.

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Mmm I feel tempted to amend what I said by saying, I’m just bitter cuz I didn’t do enough dating when I was healthy in my 20s. I didn’t know I was gonna get sick! Sorry if what I said came out a little harsh or doomsday, sometimes I just end up venting when I’m frustrated.

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I think what I left out about dating beautiful women was while I was dating them I made a lot of money. As long as the money was flowing things were well. One of the women I was dating had more money than me. But the minute my money dried up things changed. The woman I was dating, we were doing great on every level, I kid you not the week my hours got cut she cut me off on every level and was distant until I left. I think money was a big factor in dating. I consider myself average. Now I don’t have a lot of money. I get disability but I get a good amount because I made good money. But compared to a dude making bank I’m just getting by comfortably nothing grandiose. Most people date within their socioeconomic class. But this younger generation is brainwashed by the internet to marry for more money. I guess to be fair it’s been like that since the Bible. In Jane Austin the main lady of the book married a dude just because he has a house and she wanted security. I can only speak from my experience. So you could still be a decent dude and date a woman, but it would likely be a woman from the same socioeconomic class, but we all know some women have high expectations. I’ve met some beautiful women that have average looking husbands and the guys don’t make a lot of money just enough to be in the same socioeconomic class as his woman. And things work. Don’t give up hope. I see so many dudes with schizophrenia just give up on women. I’ve heard of dudes going to prison for 20 years, getting out, getting a little job, roof over their head, having a kid and living a good life. I think stereotypes and a fixed mindset can destroy a person especially if they reinforce these views in an echo chamber. Have a good day.

I had a boyfriend when I was 18 and he was 30.

Anyway, he was very unattractive and worked as a line cook for pennies.

He lived with his dad.

But you know what? He was kind, and funny, and could play the guitar and sing well.

He was also smart.

I was in love with him.

There was something that caused us to break up but I want you to know that being physically less attractive doesn’t mean you aren’t attractive in other ways.

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