Hi,
I have been cooking every day since I was a little kid, but three days ago I had to stop because I had once again let the stovetop on and completely fully let it slip my mind(for a very long time). I can not let myself cook anymore, at least not until my partner comes back in a couple of weeks and can help me not burn the house down.
It is not necessarily a short term memory problem - it honestly feel like a memory/attention/can’t fit anything more due to my thought stream - combo.
I am schizoaffective, spring is my manic time, but it has never been like this before. I do not have a system in my brain that gives priority to the important thoughts. Its a feed of randomness.
This feels extremely disabling.
I am not on meds because Of many reasons, but I am pretty good with my vitamins and omega 3s. Stared on l-lysine some days ago.
My capacity is at the moment - making tea or anything that i can heat up so i can’t leave the kitchen while it cooks. If i leave the kitchen it will burn down. If i try to stay (in order not to burn the house down) while boiling potatoes - i will suddenly have left (due to boredom, i think).
I don’t leave my house without keys, I remember money when i go to the store - i feed and medicate my dog. I EVEN REMEMBER MY VITAMINS!?
I need some suggestions on ways to cope or fix this. I like to cook and to feel useful.
My current supplements:
6grams of l-lysine
One magnesium (dont remember the mg)
One b-vitamin combo
One multivitamin
2 tbsp flax every other day
I am 27 yo and do some moderate physical activity.
Thankyou for any advice!
I do play lumosity and have GREAT results on memory, but my memory is not great IRL.
I keep the skillet or what ever on the stove. I have to turn it off so it won’t burn…
I worry about things like the stove,did I lock the door… Will it rain on my flowers. …did it rain… I have had plenty of head injuries… Fractures,skull depressions… I do find myself in moments of confusion like I can’t recognize people I know until 30 seconds later. BUT it’s ok…I have to keep it g
Thank you for responding.
Have you had any success on creating systems (such as keeping the cooking under physical control, but thinking more in terms of planned/controlled thoughts?)
My goal is a system where my eternal feed of random thougts will be overrun by actual URGENT thoughts.
I have no idea how to get there.
Good luck to me and you.
While I’m cooking , I give myself clear instructions. Such as
(I’m going to eat these tacos then go smoke a square)
Before I eat / after I’m done cooking,I always…normally wash out the pots and pans. It kinda helps
I usually have to set reminders on my phone to take my pills every day. I take aricept to try to combat the memory loss from taking cogentin. Often I will be having a conversation and immediately forget what I was talking about and then try hardly to steer the conversation somewhere else. Maybe when you start cooking you could set a timer on your phone or if your oven has one?
Haha, I guess that make sense, I just can’t force myself to listen to myself. The stream of thoughts capture me and I get carried away.
My head sounds like this Better watch that thing cooking, you always burn everything, cook cook cook, boring, takes so much time - oh yeah time to plant those seedlings out they are getting really big - but i have to get a rabbit-proof container just gonna check if i have enough wood, i could build them today, just collect all the pieces now while im cooking and then ill build it real fast afterwards.
Now you would think I would go outside and build a container for my seedlings while I’m cooking. But no -I go outside and make a doggie-pool. So when I realise there is something I should have done, I go start collecting wood for a plant container - I don’t go inside to check the damn food.
You have some good material. You should write more.
Don’t get distracted from your main focus.
Focus on one thing at a time.
Switch over when your finally done
That is very responsible of you.
I have some manic issues that makes me feel very superior to an alarm clock. My partner suggested a wristwatch with vibration (since i will then not leave it inside and be in the garden - or take it off because i hate the sound of the alarm).
My problem is that my brain is much better than a watch (true) and I can therefore manage on my own (not true) as I am capable of thinking five thoughts simultaneously (true, but part of the problem)
No, sadly I don’t have a doctor. My former psychiatrist was trying to treat my depression this winter, but then I moved (and im not depressed anymore).
My racing thoughts happen every spring, to some degree, but it has never been a threat to my safety.
I need to make a priority so that important things will force their way through. Like amazon same-day shipping.
Goal:
channel 1…channel 2… channel 3… channel 4…channel 5
conversation -----bad 80s----------writing a letter--------planning turtle–aerman radio
in my head with --music-------------to my friend-----------pond------------ todays talkshow
neigbor that is----really -------------in my head ----------------------------------------------
not present---------bad ---------------------------------------arguing why —thinking about
---------------------------------------------planning to----------only I really----whales in great
worrying about—aerman radio------never eat cooked—exist and ------detail------------
neigbors----------interviewing aerman—food again-------nobody else-------------------
--------beep------------------beeep-----------------------------beeep---------------------
----You are cooking you idiot-----------Jeeez go do something about it------------