Spontaneous combustion

I’ve been worrying about this lately. I seriously think that I am in a high risk category for this. It runs in my family. I’m actually petrified. I had three uncles and one niece and a great-aunt who were in their houses watching TV and “poof”! They all went up in a puff of flames and all that was left was a little pile of ashes.

I take normal precautions but I’m still worried. Does anyone know of any support groups for this? Is going up in a ball of flames preventable?
I’d hate to have to be on even more meds for this, I take enough of them already.


          Worried in California
1 Like

Dear Worried,

First off, the best thing you can do for yourself is to avoid dehydration. For men, 18 glasses of water a day are recommended for adequate hydration.

Try not to fall asleep while smoking, or in front of a fireplace. Wear shoes and clothing designed to minimize electric shocks, and consider having your home flooring replaced with a similar material.

Lastly, if you are a vampire, avoid direct exposure to the sunlight.

If you follow these suggestions, you should be safe from spontaneous immolation.

Best of luck,
Aunt Ruby


I don’t think it’s genetic, it’s purely spiritual :sparkles:

1 Like

Dear Aunt Ruby: You changed my life, I will heed your advice. I am forever indebted to you.

Thankful in California.


yeh pretty strange how victims of ‘spontaneous combustion’ are often smokers

1 Like

Very good @Rhubot. Very funny. I had to read it 5 times before I appreciated how funny this is.

1 Like

Moved to the Lounge.

Do they serve coffee in the lounge?
I’ll take an espresso please.


We only serve Nescafe with that weird powdered nondairy creamer.


I’ll take 5 of them please. Easy on the ice and I like mine shaken, but not stirred.

1 Like

Coming right up. :coffee: :coffee: :coffee: :coffee: :tea:
Whoops, I accidentally gave you a green tea as the last cup. :grin:

1 Like